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Feel like such a failure
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skincarefreak
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Thu Jul 27, 2006 6:54 pm      Reply with quote
Hi All,

I was hoping to get some perspective from all you intelligent women. Smile I work at an inner-city high school in Los Angeles. My immediate supervisor makes it very difficult to work there. He doesn't follow through and there are some people that are on his good list and there are others that are not. He isn't it an objective supervisor. To top it off, he makes promises that he doesn't keep and it comes back to those of us who work for him. We need to make it work, which makes our own job much more difficult. To top it off, I take my job and my caseload very seriously, but he'll go in and make changes which affect my students Brick wall

Last fall, my district began sending out flyers for this new position that will help with drop out prevention. The position seemed like a god send. It would put us on a higher pay scale and would also help the rest of us leave our job site...more importantly from the clutches of our supervisor (none of us like him).

Three of us from the site started taking those classes. We all waited by bated breath. One by one of us were called for interviews. One by one of us had our references call us to tell us the district called to check our references. Well...the other two got a position. I never got a call. I called the district to see the status of my application and was told that I wasn't on the list to call today. I might get a phone call tomorrow Crying or Very sad
I feel stuck. I've tried to leave this school a few times before and couldn't. Quite honestly, I feel like I can't breathe when I'm there. It's even worse that the other two got picked up and I didn't. Any advice that I can be given to cheer up would be greatly appreciated. Thanks you all...You're great!
Emma_Jane
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Thu Jul 27, 2006 8:06 pm      Reply with quote
Wow, I'm not sure that I have advice for you, but I have a lot of sympathy, working in an inner city high school must present enough challenges without an incompetent manager. As for the job applications, I wouldn't read too much into it, so many of these processes are somewhat arbitrary.

I don't work in your field, but I know that in my own field the rule for keeping yourself somewhat mobile is essentially: network, network, network. In my field, reputation is immensely important, and the more people who know you and know your reputation, the better. It is not an instant solution, but I would get involved in as many things as possible that involve working with people in other schools, or other areas so that you get your self out there, so that when you apply for something there is someone around who will recognize your name. Also, don't be too vocal about your manager outside of situations where it is actually necessary to stand up for yourself and your students; some people will know he is incompetent, but many people who may one day regard you as a potential job candidate will put at least part of the blame on you, which you don't want.

Hang in there, switching out of a bad position can be a slow and tedious process, but you will get there eventually.
montrealgal
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Thu Jul 27, 2006 10:46 pm      Reply with quote
Skincarefreak, poor you Sad

What would you say to a close friend who was going through this? I don't think you would want her to think of herself as a failure.

Please be kind, patient, and gentle with yourself Smile
skincarefreak
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Fri Jul 28, 2006 10:20 am      Reply with quote
Thank you Emma_jane and Montrealgal,

This is the next day and I'm at work. It is a bad situation. Everyone is frusterated. His incompetency is affecting classes, teachers, and counselors. Even fellow administrators don't like him. Ugghhh...I've spent a good part of last year and a good part of this year crying, because I just get so frusterated.

To top it off...my salary is freezing this year. That position would have allowed me to have an increase for the next 5 yrs atleast.

Anyhow, no call. I just feel stuck...I guess I just have accept it. Thanks again.
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Fri Jul 28, 2006 10:50 am      Reply with quote
But,dont give up. You deserve so much better.
Now, that you have shared your problem,you have all of us praying and sending positive thoughts and energy your way.Expect wonderful things to happen.

Skincare addict
skincarefreak
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Fri Jul 28, 2006 12:10 pm      Reply with quote
Skin Care Addict,

Thank you so much sweety...It's much appreciated.
Moonstarr
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Fri Jul 28, 2006 5:57 pm      Reply with quote
You know what I always believe ... that if something doesn't happen, it's because something better is on the way. I really hope that things will turn around for you. Smile
skincarefreak
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Fri Jul 28, 2006 9:40 pm      Reply with quote
Thank you Moonstarr...I hope so too.

Thank you Ladies!
guapagirl
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 4:04 am      Reply with quote
Can you not discuss this with one of HIS superiors? Or have a word with your union rep?

I work in education and well know how one crappy person in authority can screw stuff up.

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wildflower
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 8:42 am      Reply with quote
My advice is never stop trying and don't you dare ever give up. Maybe that other position you applied for wasn't as great as you thought? Maybe the universe is saving something better and more special for you? Believe me, I know how much it sucks to not get something you really want and to feel stuck - I've been there more than enough times myself. But we only get ourselves stuck by not instigating change, by wallowing and not taking action. If you really hate your job, find another one you will like, even if it's unrelated to your field and even if it's only for a short while. Life is too short to be miserable. What kept me going during the tough times and what still keeps me going is the belief that there is something great out there just waiting for me to find and accept it. Don't sell yourself short and never settle. Stay positive and focus on the gifts you have and the good things in your life. It's not easy but it does help. Just believe in yourself and believe that you have the power to make things happen. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger and when you've learned the lessons that you're meant to learn at your present job, you'll see that many doors will open up for you. Keep your chin up and keep smiling. Your day in the sun will come.
skincarefreak
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 9:36 am      Reply with quote
Hi guapagirl,

It seems like education is full of people who are shady. His superior was just as shady. So much so that they moved him to the disctrict office...so I've heard. I did our union rep and I also did call the district. They were less the helpful. He asked me to do something that was illegal Shock . I thought that was the best way to report him. My union rep was friends with the principal...so that didn't work. Our district union rep told me to report and that was it...I was to get no job security because I wasn't a teacher. Rolling Eyes It was awful. Btw, the principal and he are long time friends, but the tide is turning. We're getting a new principal...and he's worked with him before. Infact they sent him running from that school to ours. Laughing Our principal saved him.

Wildflower,
Thank you for the kind words. I have looked for something else to do, but I'm hindered in the fact that I've been in education for 10 yrs. My experience lies on that field, but I am working my way to try to have my own business in less than 2 yrs. I am excited about that. Very Happy The problem is no matter what you do...you can have an idiot for a boss.
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 11:06 am      Reply with quote
Woops! I meant I did tell our union rep Shock It's too late to edit it. Rolling Eyes
I should check what I write before I send.
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 11:13 am      Reply with quote
Don't worry, I often feel like 'doing' my union rep, but that's a different story Wink Bummer that you have such an old boy network there.

Maybe you should think about a change of direction?

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skincarefreak
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Sat Jul 29, 2006 11:47 am      Reply with quote
Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Guapagirl...Your Awesome. Thank you for the laugh!
Yeah well ours isn't my type Rolling Eyes Yes, I was hoping for that with this, but that didn't pan out. We'll see what happens.
skincarefreak
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Mon Jul 31, 2006 5:46 pm      Reply with quote
Update: It seems like there were hardly any people placed. I can't seem to get an answer...They won't tell me if I will be or won't Crying or Very sad At this point, I just would like to know what's going to happen next month. Do I stay or do I go?
I'm trying to be positive here but I do realize that 2 co-workers are leaving and my supervisor will want to replace them. I hope he doesn't move me to the other track. If he does I won't get my vacation. I hate feeling this way...that he can just do that but I wouldn't be suprised if he did. i just wonder...can I refuse and not be insubordinate?
I'm ok with not getting the position...if that is the case, but I don't want to stay and get jerked around from him either.
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