HELP!! How do I get a 5 month old to sleep?
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free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 7:00 am

I am really hoping there are some experienced mamas on here that can help me out. My son will not nap during the day, he will fall asleep in my arms but as soon as I place him in the crib he wakes up. Most days I'm lucky if I get 2 half hour naps out of him, then he wants to go to bed by 5:30-6:00 pm at night because he only slept maybe an hour in the daytime,and he fights it till the end for bedtime too, even with a routine, he's awake at 2-3 in the morning again to eat, last night he was up at 2:30am and we couldn't settle him back down until 4:00 this morning...I know he can sleep the night because he has a few times! I don't know what to do anymore, I've tried almost everything I think except letting him cry himself to sleep. Right now he is in his crib crying because hes tired and wants to nap, but is fighting it. I go in there, pick him up and rock him, settle him back down and put him in the crib, and he starts crying again. I read about this method from the baby whisperer.com but pickup/putdown does not work for my ds!
I'm hoping someone can help me with this issue, I'm willing to try almost anything at this point! I was going to let him cry it out, but from what I read he is still too young at 5 months. I am really hoping there are some "baby whisperer's" out there that can give this tired mom some tips! TIA!!

Donna

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 7:14 am

Ahh, this takes me back. Mine are now 10 and 7. My son (who is now 10) was a very demanding and hungry baby. What I found was, if you feed them in the day, then they will sleep at night. You could try to see whether he keeps crying because he wants more food, if so feed him and hopefully, he might settle. Good luck.HTH

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 7:22 am

Thanks sharons123...He already eats alot during the day! He consumes around 35-40 oz of formula, plus I started him on a little rice cereal at bedtime, so I don't think food is an issue at this point. Most of the time he drifts off to sleep with the bottle in his mouth, and then I put him in the crib and he's wide awake again! Confused

Donna

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 7:45 am

My son was the same way. He is nine now. He would fall asleep, I would put him down, and he his eyes would just pop open. If he did sleep when I put him down, which were few, it was for about 15 minutes. Very wierd. But, he slept all night, even when he was just a few weeks old, so I feel for you. I would see what your doctor would say. There might be some reasons why hes not sleeping well.

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 8:42 am

moosette wrote:

Thanks sharons123...He already eats alot during the day! He consumes around 35-40 oz of formula, plus I started him on a little rice cereal at bedtime, so I don't think food is an issue at this point. Most of the time he drifts off to sleep with the bottle in his mouth, and then I put him in the crib and he's wide awake again! Confused

Donna

Hi Donna!

I have a almost seven month old baby boy too, I was very lucky that my mother recommended a book for me to read about getting your baby to sleep through the night. Its called "On becoming baby wise". This book is a lifesaver! In case you cant run out and buy it right away(although I highly recommed you get it ASAP) I'll give you the rundown on the book. The whole conecpt is you put your baby on a schedule, if you create order during the day then he WILL sleep all night(every parents dream!). I will list the rules below.

1. Never feed or rock your baby to sleep, this creates a dependency on you for them to be able to go to sleep, creating a baby who is unable to soothe himself to bed(an important skill to have if you want them to be able to sleep on their own without "props"). Also I dont mean to scold you but falling asleep with a bottle is really bad for their enamel and mouth devolpement, it can rot the teeth and cause "baby bottle mouth" where the teeth form pushed out around the nipple, I wasnt aware if this either!

2.No props to sleep, this includes nursing to sleep, falling asleep with a bottle, rocking to sleep, pacifiers, or relying on a swing to put them out.

3. Establish a sleep pattern during the day. This should consist of a "cycle", ie: wake, feed, playime, naptime-repeat. B/c your baby is older and bottlefed you should be able to do a 3 1/2 or 4 hour cycle. The whole idea is that if the baby is well rested during the day he will sleep properly at night, also babies love routine so the closer you stick to it the happier baby will be in turn making things easier on you.

4. Establish a wake time for the day, if your day starts at say 7:30 get your baby up and feed him first thing. He may already have a set time he gets up, if its a reasonable time for you to start then you might want to stay with it.

5. Establish a bedtime time and routine. I put my baby down at 8 pm everynight. I start the bedtime routine as soon as he wakes from his last nap of the day, I feed him, give him a bath, play with him, then we move into his room and maybe play some soothing music and do a relaxing activity, maybe look at a book or just cuddle. When 8 rolls around he goes down, no matter what.

You baby may be a little fussy when adjusting to this new routine but that is to be expected. If you start your routine and he cries, you may go soothe him but I try to limit it to once and I dont pick him up, I just pat him and wisper that momma loves him but its time to sleep, or I dont let him see me at all and just make sure he is ok, him seeing me usually makes him cry harder and longer, he will fall asleep eventually I promise! I know that it seems like forever when you have a screaming baby but in reality my son never cried more than 20 mins when first starting on this schedule. You just have to hang in there! Im providing a sample routine below but you can tweak it to your lifestyle. Understand that you dont have to stick to this completely, once he is use to it you should be able to be flexable with in 30 mins of the scheduled nap time.

This is usually the schedule my son follows but again you can tweak it to fit your life, it is recommened though that you put him to bed between 8 and 8:30.

First wake time 7:00am-ish
Change diaper
Feed
awake time/play time
down for first nap between 9am and 9:30 am
(this will vary b/c some babies like to be up for a while, whereas my son usually gets fussy after about an hour and 1/2, you will just have to wait and see how your baby reacts)

wake at 11am
change diaper
feed
wake time/playtime
nap at 1 pm

wake at 3pm
change diaper
feed
waketime/playtime
nap at 5pm

wake at 7pm
feed
bath
bedtime routine
down for the night by 8 or 8:30

You can use the time he is awake to run errands or take care of what ever you need to, usually once they are used to the schedule they will sleep in the car or stroller. This is not ment to be restrictive to your life but to make it easier for you to do what you need to while taking care of babys needs(demand feeding only makes baby fussier and mom exausted). Watch for tired cues such as rubbing eyes or becoming hyper active. If you see these and its 30 mins before his scheduled nap then put him down anyway, it may take him that long to wind down and fall asleep. If he wakes up before the scheduled time let him stay in the bed as close to his waketime as you can unless he becomes fussy, then you can get him up to feed him.

It may take up to 2 weeks for him to get use to the new routine, just hang in there it will happen, alot of times babies will fall into it after only a few days. Of course the exception to this is if you baby is sick, then you can hold him and soothe him, you may find though that he will want to stick to it even if he is sick!

Also if he wakes in the middle of the night dont rush in there right away, wait about 10-15 mins., alot of time they will go back to sleep.

Remember that it is very important to feed him when he wakes up so that he is full and happy while he is awake, if you feed him to sleep he will just be fussy and hungry while he is awake, makeing his awaketime unpleasent for him and you.

I think I covered everything, if you have any questions feel free to PM me or or post them here. I hope this helps you! Very Happy

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 9:20 am

Thanks Vonstella! I've heard about this routine and did try it at around 4 months, but
it wasn't really working for us since ds is a snacker during the day and never eats a full bottle at once. He will wake and have a couple ounces, then a hour later have a couple more etc. I never put him to bed with a bottle, but I do rock him in the nursery with the rest of his bottle he didn't finish and he falls to sleep while I do this. All your tips sound great! I do let my son cry abit before going in during the night, but its so hard to hear him cry.
What age was your son when you introduced this routine?
I know I better get busy and do something soon, we all aren't getting any rest and he needs to learn to fall asleep eventually! I think starting tommorow we will try this again.
Thanks a million...I'll keep you posted to what transpires!
Donna

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 9:24 am

moosette wrote:

Thanks Vonstella! I've heard about this routine and did try it at around 4 months, but
it wasn't really working for us since ds is a snacker during the day and never eats a full bottle at once. He will wake and have a couple ounces, then a hour later have a couple more etc. I never put him to bed with a bottle, but I do rock him in the nursery with the rest of his bottle he didn't finish and he falls to sleep while I do this. All your tips sound great! I do let my son cry abit before going in during the night, but its so hard to hear him cry.
What age was your son when you introduced this routine?
I know I better get busy and do something soon, we all aren't getting any rest and he needs to learn to fall asleep eventually! I think starting tommorow we will try this again.
Thanks a million...I'll keep you posted to what transpires!
Donna

The book says to start a healthy baby out on this around 3 months, I started around then with my son. I know its hard to hear him cry but, its worse to have a toddler that still gets up at night and doesnt sleep during nap time! Please keep me up dated! Good luck! Very Happy

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:05 pm

moosette wrote:

I am really hoping there are some experienced mamas on here that can help me out. My son will not nap during the day, he will fall asleep in my arms but as soon as I place him in the crib he wakes up. Most days I'm lucky if I get 2 half hour naps out of him, then he wants to go to bed by 5:30-6:00 pm at night because he only slept maybe an hour in the daytime,and he fights it till the end for bedtime too, even with a routine, he's awake at 2-3 in the morning again to eat, last night he was up at 2:30am and we couldn't settle him back down until 4:00 this morning...I know he can sleep the night because he has a few times! I don't know what to do anymore, I've tried almost everything I think except letting him cry himself to sleep. Right now he is in his crib crying because hes tired and wants to nap, but is fighting it. I go in there, pick him up and rock him, settle him back down and put him in the crib, and he starts crying again. I read about this method from the baby whisperer.com but pickup/putdown does not work for my ds!
I'm hoping someone can help me with this issue, I'm willing to try almost anything at this point! I was going to let him cry it out, but from what I read he is still too young at 5 months. I am really hoping there are some "baby whisperer's" out there that can give this tired mom some tips! TIA!!

Donna

Oh, I really feel for you! Believe me, I've been there too (still am!).

My sons are 5, 3 and 12 weeks. I had this problem with sons 1 and 2 -- it was especially hard with son 2. Son 1 wanted to eat every 2 hours, including at night. Son 2 would always wake up (even from a dead sleep) AS SOON AS I put him in his crib! It was so exhausting. Now, I've changed a few things with son 3 and I can put him in his crib and he sleeps fine (even wakes up and puts himself back to sleep) which amazes me to no end.

Here's what I've learned personally along the way that works for me.

First of all, every family is different and one way might work great for one family but might not work for another. That's OK. Nothings worse, sometimes, than sitting around with a bunch of mamas talking and feeling bad that you are not measuring up because your house isn't clean enough, your marriage isn't as great or your kids are not doing the right things!

I tried the babywise system on son 1 when he was 12 weeks old. We perservered for one month and then I gave up. The kid wanted to eat every two hours! Making him wait three made us BOTH miserable. Why fight it?

After that, I decided to start researching other methods. I had naturally started sleeping with son 1 because I breastfed him (and the others too) and he ate so much at night, it just started happening as we fell asleep together after the feedings ended. He would start the night out in the crib but ended the rest of the night in our bed. It worked for us.

I am the type of mama that lets the baby fall asleep on the breast (or in your case, with the bottle in the mouth). Bad, bad habit but it was the easy way out for me. Surefire way to get sons 1 and 2 asleep. Son 3, I've worked very hard to pull out the nipple when he's almost asleep so he learns to settle himself down himself. It's working much better this time...I think that is helping him like his crib better because he doesn't need me to fall asleep all the way.

Son 2, after 2 nights with a newborn, I just said "forget it" and he started sleeping with us right away in our bed. I adjusted and recuperated from delivery so much faster that time. Glad I did that except.....here's the kicker.... that little stinker HATED cribs. He would sleep very soundly on our bed but if I tried to put him in a crib, waaaa waaaa waaaaa. **sigh** I did not like that because when he got older, I worried he would wake up and fall off the bed (even though we have gates on both sides of the bed I worried about him crawling to the bottom of the bed so I would barricade it).

With son 3, I decided to work with him on the crib issue from day 1. I did not want to go through with that whole scenario with son 2 all over again. Son 3 did not like the crib either but I did give in at about 2 months and now he sleeps on his stomach. He's always had great neck strength so I felt good about doing that during the day (I will not do it at night when he goes to sleep in his crib because I cannot see him). I check on him all the time so I feel safe but this is something each mama has to decide for herself when to allow it. The babies always wake themselves up abruptly because of their jerking nervous system. It really helps them sleep better if they are on their stomachs because then they can't jerk themselves awake too easily. Son 3 will even put himself to sleep sometimes if he's somewhat awake now when I put him in his crib. I am always shocked when it happens! Laughing

Finally, the whole issue of letting them cry it out. You really have to decide if that's right for you and your husband and if you are determined enough to perservere with it. It's sooooo tough. I, personally, am NOT the type to let them cry it out (young babies are crying out for you for a reason, I believe, and it's cruel to ignore them--of course, 5-month-olds are different-- and I believe they are not trying to manipulate you....even if grandma insists that they are! Rolling Eyes

). That said, I don't think it's bad to let them work it out sometimes. They get overtired but can't settle down so sometimes for your own sanity, it's perfectly OK to put them in thier crib to cry awhile while you let them get a bit more tired. Sometimes, they just get too crabby to make happy and a 10-minute cry (give or take) makes them soooo much more inclined to accept your soothing! With son 3, we decided from the beginning that he needed to be able to go to bed in his pack-'n-play in our room and not on our bed. We would have to let him cry awhile to get him inclined to go to bed. (Honestly, what is it about babies and NOT wanting to go to sleep?! They can take naps great during the day but going to bed at night...that's a whole 'nother senario!) We are still working on this issue (he's only 12 weeks still!) but he is soooo much better. I can put him in the pack-'n-play now and have him open his eyes and then he will shut them again and go to sleep. Whew.

What's important, I think, for you to know is that you need to find what works for you. It's OK to take a little from one person and a little from another. Remember, though, "this too shall pass!!" Before you know it, the first year is over, the little guy is walking and you have a whole other set of issues to deal with.

Oh, yeah, one more thing about naps. Ya know, some kids even from real early days give up or don't like afternoon naps. If they seem to survive the day OK, I've seen lots of families give up and just put their kid to bed early. Who knows? Maybe your baby is going to be like one of those kids.

I hope all this is at least comforting to you during this time. It's sooo exhausting to be in your situation! Vostella was awesome to write so much in her earlier post -- it's so hard to find the time! To write this much myself has taken me hours and right now, I have two toddlers that are cranky and hungry and very tired so I must go. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted!.... Rolling Eyes

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:41 pm

I do agree that its different strokes for different folkes, the baby wise cycle is meant for older babies who are mostly bottlefed, of course you dont let an newborn cry when he is hungry! Breastfed babies are a different story, when I was breastfeeding there was no way I could put him on a schedule, you almost have to do demand feedings, as the breast milk is so thin. With formula its different b/c it is thicker, I didnt start doing the 4 hour schedule untill about 2 weeks ago when he started taking in 8-9oz per feeding and some solids. I had previously done a 2 1/2 to 3 hour feeding schedule. If nothing else I think it would help to get your baby to eat a full meal at a time, instead of snacking, if he doesnt have a full belly there is no way he will sleep.

I think that Ellyp is right in saying that you have to find out what works for you and your family, every baby is different. Very Happy

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:31 pm

vonstella wrote:

Breastfed babies are a different story, when I was breastfeeding there was no way I could put him on a schedule, you almost have to do demand feedings, as the breast milk is so thin.

That's the main reason the babywise system didn't work for me. My son has a high metabolism (sure wish I did!) and he ate every two hours to the minute (very weird!). After our experiment in scheduled feedings, I just gave in and did on-demand. At the time, I was going to La Leche League meetings and checked out a few of their books. Lo and behold, there is a school of parenting out there called "attachment parenting." I found out I was doing naturally what they advocated. I remember from the babywise book how that author just skewered this line of thought as terrible for your kid. Well, I went with my gut and what was already right for our family and started following more of the attachment parenting suggestions. The whole situation humbled me because I was so sure what it meant to be a great mom and what the right course of action was. Any other action than following a babywise-system would equate to messed up or spoiled kids. Boy was I so sure of myself! I am much more laid back about parenting philosophies now because I was so certain of myself before (and secretly judgemental of others Embarassed

).

By the way, my kids are doing great. They are sweet, respectful and, what I love, the two brothers get along beautifully. They are boys and they are crazy but they are caring to others and not spoiled and demanding. Lesson I learned: one step at a time, don't judge others and take what works for you and leave what doesn't. Motherhood sure has a way of humbling you!

Does anyone out there have advice about 5-year-olds????? Geez, now that's a stage that is becoming more challenging by the day!! Shock

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 6:12 pm

Ladies WOW just reading all that made me tired.. I am not a mum, but have been toying with the idea... but perhaps I better rethink it because when I originally read the title, the first thing that came into my mind was... "whiskey?" Razz

I'll return you now to those with some serious and meaningful advice.

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 6:50 pm

tiger_tim wrote:

Ladies WOW just reading all that made me tired.. I am not a mum, but have been toying with the idea... but perhaps I better rethink it because when I originally read the title, the first thing that came into my mind was... "whiskey?" Razz

I'll return you now to those with some serious and meaningful advice.

Tiger_tim, I sure missed you when you were sick! This forum is no fun without you! Laughing

I'm glad you are starting to recover.

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 7:31 pm

... That was too funny tiger_tim, Don't let my post deter you from impending motherhood...I've thought about some whiskey myself from time to time! Very Happy

We have our good days and bad...but mostly good because he's the best thing that ever happened to me! Wink

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 10:29 pm

ellyp wrote:

vonstella wrote:

Breastfed babies are a different story, when I was breastfeeding there was no way I could put him on a schedule, you almost have to do demand feedings, as the breast milk is so thin.

That's the main reason the babywise system didn't work for me. My son has a high metabolism (sure wish I did!) and he ate every two hours to the minute (very weird!). After our experiment in scheduled feedings, I just gave in and did on-demand. At the time, I was going to La Leche League meetings and checked out a few of their books. Lo and behold, there is a school of parenting out there called "attachment parenting." I found out I was doing naturally what they advocated. I remember from the babywise book how that author just skewered this line of thought as terrible for your kid. Well, I went with my gut and what was already right for our family and started following more of the attachment parenting suggestions. The whole situation humbled me because I was so sure what it meant to be a great mom and what the right course of action was. Any other action than following a babywise-system would equate to messed up or spoiled kids. Boy was I so sure of myself! I am much more laid back about parenting philosophies now because I was so certain of myself before (and secretly judgemental of others Embarassed

).

By the way, my kids are doing great. They are sweet, respectful and, what I love, the two brothers get along beautifully. They are boys and they are crazy but they are caring to others and not spoiled and demanding. Lesson I learned: one step at a time, don't judge others and take what works for you and leave what doesn't. Motherhood sure has a way of humbling you!

Does anyone out there have advice about 5-year-olds????? Geez, now that's a stage that is becoming more challenging by the day!! Shock

Its funny how what works for some doesnt work for others, the La Leche League always made me feel like if I didnt breastfeed for 5 years I was a bad mom. Come on! I couldnt make milk past 3 months! I was so tired I could barely shower with out falling asleep(my son was/is a big baby w/ a very high metabolism too!) I felt so gulity when I switched to formula, like I was commiting a crime. Rolling Eyes

Ellyp-I understand how the babywise schedule seems very extreme, but I think the same can be said for some aspects of the La Leche League, both want you to be one way or the other, nothing in between. The truth is that life is in between, as Im sure you know, and neither way works ALL the time! I think breastfeeding is the best thing you can do for your baby but, I dont like feeling like Im a bad Mom b/c I cant keep up. Even after gaining 55 pounds during pregnancy I was only to 155 total weight, once that baby was out of me I was dropping weight so fast my body didnt know what to do(and at 5'8 I need all the curves I can get Laughing

Im still mourning the loss of my boobs and butt!). I dont really like all the concepts of "attachment parenting" or babywise direction. I dont think a mother should be expected to run herself ragged to meet damands that her body isnt capeable of, nor do I think an infant should fend for itself. I appluade women who can breastfeed for a year or more, my poor body even at 24 wasnt up to the task!

I dont think that either parenting method turns out a better child than the other, just maybe it makes it easier for the parent to feel more in control with what they feel comfortable with, and as long as the baby is happy, healthy and well loved it dosent really matter.

free skin care · Fri Sep 15, 2006 11:18 pm

battery operated swing worked when my daughter was around that age!

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 8:48 am

The swing doesn't work either...my son is what you call "high needs" and doesn't like the swing, bouncey chair, stroller, carseat, or anything but mommy and daddy's arms! It makes for a very long day!
Donna

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 9:22 am

Hey Donna, what about one of those sling thingys (these are so popular in japan now.. see everyone with them - even the dads!). At least you would have 2 hands free to type out EDS posts whilst bub slept "attached" to you. Laughing

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 10:21 am

I was thinking of a sling, but I don't know if it would be good for my back since he's closing in on 19 pounds! Just luggin' him around all day my lower back is killin me! Laughing

One day I even vacuumed the whole house carrying him in my other arm...its the only way I can get any housework done...so maybe a sling would come in handy?? Neutral

Are there weight restictions on these slings or can they be used for awhile?

Today he is taking longer naps, he still fought me but mommy won the battle (this time)...he's been napping now for over an hour, probably because its such a dreary and rainy day its dark in his bedroom. And last night he slept from 6:30pm until 7:00am this morning, so I can't complain about that! Very Happy

Vonstella...I have a question for you, do you darken your sons room for naps? I heard that you arent supposed to because then they won't beable to distinquish night from day and get all mixed up...is this true?
Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!
Donna

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 2:46 pm

moosette wrote:

Vonstella...I have a question for you, do you darken your sons room for naps? I heard that you arent supposed to because then they won't beable to distinquish night from day and get all mixed up...is this true?
Thanks everyone for your great suggestions!
Donna

I dont darken it, I do have curtians up but they are a light sheer-ish material. I have read that its OK to do if your baby has sleeping issues, heck if it works I say go for it! Im sure their internal alarms will still work just fine for that 6am feeding! Rolling Eyes

Also, I think that the weight limit on those slings is like 20lbs...you might want to double check.

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:08 pm

The problem with getting into something like 'the baby whisperer' is that is does not allow for any fluctuations. Like, your son, at 5 months may be going through a growth spurt and may, in fact, need to eat at night. Babies have VERY small stomachs that don't hold very much so who are we to say that a baby does not ever need to eat during the night? How does anyone know that?

The Baby Book by Dr William Sears is excellent and I found it more 'middle of the road' than the others. You might want to check it out.

I also read somewhere that babies younger than 18 months cannot be "spoiled" by picking them up when they are crying. What if they just need to hear a heart beat or something?

I also read that human babies have 2 gestational periods: 1 is 9.5 months inside the womb and the 2nd is for the next 9 months outside of the womb. Think about it from their perspective- they are in the womb for their whole existance and then bam! everything changes. Crying is the only way they have of telling us whether or not they need something and I think wanting to be held is just as important as being fed and stuff.

My daughter, who just turned 4 this summer, sounds a lot like your son. Some friends of mine did the cry it out but my daugther would SCREAM while other babies maybe cried for 10 minutes before going to sleep. It was WAY more stressful for me to hear that screaming than to cuddle her to sleep.

Babies are born with different personalities. My daughter was high needs in that way- just like your son. Did not like the stroller, car seat, baby swing, vibrating baby chair, excersaucer!!!! She wanted to be held!!!

My daughter also had a very hard time napping during the day. I ended up having to dance her to sleep!! (yeah, i know what all you baby whisperers are thinking.....) I would put on music and dance her/rock her to sleep.

Babies like your son, and my daughter are very sensitive and will feel the temperature change if you try and put them in a cold crib or bed after falling alseep on your body. I ended up putting a futon matress on the floor for my daughter (instead of using the crib) and after she fell asleep in my arms I would first make sure that I had a blanket around her and that it was warm. If I tried to put her on a cold bed she would wake up right away. Then I would lie down on the bed and slowly roll her over so she was bedside me and I would lie with her for a few minutes until I knew she was still asleep and then I could get up.

It seems like a lot, I know, but if you knew my daughter it was the least stressful thing for me to do (couldn't handle the screaming- she had/has the loudest cry of any kid I've ever known).

At about just over a year I started not dancing her to sleep and would just put her in the bed (futon on the floor) lay beside her and rock her with my hand (after nursing her) until she was asleep. She did not develop any sleeping problems from me putting her to sleep that way.

Some kids are not easy sleepers. My daughter gave up day time napping earlier than any other baby I knew- and then she only napped about once every 3 to 4 days.

My daughter did not sleep through the night until she was 2- not one time before that as that is when she was on all solids and no breast milk.

I also must say that my daughter is very confident and bright and can articulate what she wants and even though I didn't have it as easy as some of the moms that put their babies on rigid schedules, I would not change ANY of it to anything different.

Lastly just remember that "this too shall pass" and it does even though you sometimes think it never will.

What I've come to realize is there is not one parenting method that works for all parents or all babies. Most moms intiutively do what their own babies need. Just be confident and listen to your intuition about what you think is right for your son and then everything else will fall into place!

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:11 pm

Instead of a sling, a baby bjorn would be good at the age your son is at. He can face outwards when he is awake. (Or inwards toward you if he wants.) It was the best thing I ever spent money on and the only thing my daugther liked to be in. I cooked, did my housework when she was in that thing otherwise I wouldn't have been able to get ANYTHING done!

The other thing I had that was good was called a "hip hammock" where the baby sits on your hip in it. I think Platex or someone bought out the design (i had bought mine from the original woman who made and sold them).

free skin care · Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:17 pm

Another thing about phases... growth spurts are one (that is often why a baby will sleep through the night for awhile and then start waking up again) and the other is teething. Your son might not have any teeth showing but that can start to bother babies (esp sensitive ones) and may cause them to wake up or be more cranky but it's hard to tell that if no teeth are poking through yet.

free skin care · Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:43 pm

Just info: my youngest didn't sleep more than 2 hours until he was six months old: he didn't sleep more than six hours until he was 10 months. And he didn't sleep through the night until he was about 18 months. The middle one, however, slept through the night at about 5 weeks: I woke up one morning and he hadn't woken me and I completely panicked! They are all different. It's not what you want to hear, but my feeling is you have to go with the flow. It won't last forever and, in my experience (I did try it) letting them cry achieves nothing. Take him into your bed (safely) and give him the closeness he craves. I don't think you can 'spoil' a baby.

free skin care · Sun Sep 17, 2006 6:51 pm

Have you tried putting her into maybe a door jumper to for an hour or say say two hrs before sleep time to get her very tired!....My daughter loved it at that age and used to happily jump at the kitchen door while I cooked...

free skin care · Mon Sep 18, 2006 6:46 pm

Mithai...thanks for the tip! I will have to try that one, although most times he only likes the jolly jumper for maybe 10-15 minutes then he starts to fuss! He hasn't got the hang of jumping with it yet...he's still learning!

Cesce and Lily...thanks for your suggestions also! I really want cio to be my very last resort...I don't want to do it if I don't have to and am trying everything in my power to get him to sleep in his crib, when I rock him to sleep at night and put him in there, he usually goes to sleep fine at some point, but naptimes he doesnt want to go in there at all, its funny. I am really not into co-sleeping, I don't sleep well with him in our bed...we have tried it and I'm so worried I would roll over on to him...I'm a restless sleeper and would be keeping him awake with my rolling. You are so right that every baby is different, but being a first time mom, sometimes its nice to get different ideas, so maybe I can find something else I could try, it might work it might not..but at least I gave it a shot!

Vonstella... Today I started a daily log to mark down his sleep/feed/naptimes so I have a better idea of how to go about introducing somewhat of a schedule. I've been finding with my son that the only time he will take a full 6 oz bottle is first thing in the morning and late afternoon, otherwise he will only take 3 oz per feeding in the daytime...say 3 oz at 10:00am and then the rest of the bottle an hour later.He likes to snack this way so a strict schedule would be out of the question at this point perhaps.
I will still track his feedings and sleeptimes though for probably a couple weeks to see if I can see any patterns and maybe I can introduce somewhat of a flexible schedule to suit his needs. Your schedule would never work for him...I tried to do it today...this is what happened:
7:00pm bedtime
4:00am awake and 6 oz bottle
4:30am sleep
8:00am awake 3 oz bottle (only wanted half)
9:00am wanted the other 3 oz
10:30am 3oz
11:00am nap 15 minutes
1:00pm nap in truck 45 minutes (hubby& I went for a drive in the country)
2:30pm 3oz formula
4:00pm 6oz formula
4:45pm 35 minute nap with daddy
6:00pm 6 oz formula/bath
7:00pm play/cuddle with mom
8:00pm bedtime
He slept like a champ last night though...12 hours! Maybe thats why he doesn't want to nap? Confused

So do you think a schedule is out of the question for my son? I can't force him to eat if he isn't hungry, and I think I gave him plenty of time to be hungry, almost 4 hours the first feeding..what do you think?

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