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Sat Sep 30, 2006 11:12 pm  |
| Do you give gifts to co-worker if he just got married and you were not invited to the wedding? What kind of gift would you give? |
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Mon Oct 09, 2006 7:05 pm |
| i would say no to a present if i wasn't invited. |
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about to hit my 40s, retin-a user, differin, LRP |
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Mon Oct 09, 2006 7:16 pm |
| skincareaddicted wrote: |
| i would say no to a present if i wasn't invited. |
I would second that.
Although at work we do pass around a card and drop in some money if we wish to do so for a present. |
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34, oily acne-prone skin, Toronto, Canada |
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Mon Oct 09, 2006 9:37 pm |
| However, he was just promoted to be my manager now. Also, there is no card passed around. How much a gift would be appropriate? |
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Mon Oct 09, 2006 11:23 pm |
| perhaps you could circulate a card then? i don't know if you should give money to someone who is superior in position though. seems kinda strange to me. |
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about to hit my 40s, retin-a user, differin, LRP |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 11:23 am |
Haha, are you thinking of bribery?
I don't think I would circulate a card - too much trouble for me. I think I've just found an inexpensive nice gift for him. |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 12:38 pm |
| xzou wrote: |
I don't think I would circulate a card - too much trouble for me. I think I've just found an inexpensive nice gift for him. |
I still think that your best bet would be to write congrats on a card and pass it around the office. It's not too personal, yet shows him that people took the time out to give him their blessing.
But if you do go with some other gift, it should be fine as well  . |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 1:35 pm |
I'd say a big fat NO! You weren't invited....and I'd be pissed ever so slightly....  |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 1:40 pm |
| bex wrote: |
| I'd say a big fat NO! You weren't invited....and I'd be pissed ever so slightly.... |
That just got me to thinking. One of my professors got married last week. He had told the entire class, as well as have had his now wife come here to watch him teach during our class. The only person that may have been invited to his wedding was the aid, which he had known for a long time. It's not like the class circulated a card or got him gifts for his wedding. We applauded, and thats about it. A few people said congrats. However, the situation may be a bit different  . |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 4:33 pm |
| Thank you ladies for all of your input! |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 8:35 pm |
This topic is a work pet peeve of mine ... I started a new job, in a new town a few years back and all the ladies in the office (which was everyone in the office except 3) were throwing a wedding shower for the bride to be. I felt like I should go given this was the first or second week of my new job, and then knowing if I would be there, I couldn't be without a gift (it's a small town ... people talk  ) I know, I didn't have to go the wedding shower so I didn't have to get her a gift, but as mentioned above, I would have been the only one not there. Anyways. I ended up getting her some corning wear as her gift (so it was about $35 cdn) which was in her registry. She did say, "you didn't have to", but I knew inside if I didn't, she'd think "are you cheap??" and so would the rest of the office.
Oh and no, I was not invited to the wedding either. |
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Tue Oct 10, 2006 9:20 pm |
| No present since you're not invited. However since he's your manager, I would still give him a card just so you'll be in his good books. In this world where it's all about who you know, i think it's harmless sucking up to your superiors. You never know when you'll need a good reference one day. |
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Wed Oct 11, 2006 4:54 pm |
| I agree -- no present and just a card. My manager got married over the summer -- she was my manager for less than a year at that point. She made a point of not making a big deal out of her engagement or wedding -- told her directs about the wedding maybe a week before. None of us were invited. No present given as a group or individually by anyone on the team. We didn't even get our act together enough to circulate a card. |
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