Anybody else's SO frequently not home & working?
EDS Skin Care Forums Forum Index » EDS Lounge

free skin care · Fri Nov 03, 2006 10:37 pm

My boyfriend started working as a firefighter/paramedic for our city, he used to work as an emt at the hospital I work at. I'm a surgeon finishing my residency (almost done Rolling Eyes

) therefore, he has never worked more than me, and he used to always be home when I am home (and at the hospital when I was at the hospital) which I used to love so much! My schedule is slowing down a bit, and now he's gone for 24 hours every three days Sad

I miss him so much. I cried a lot the first two times he was gone (I know, I'm being ridiculous, this is just the third 24 hour period he's been gone). I know a lot of peoples' husbands and wives also go overseas in wars for months, so I really need to stop complaining. But I just hate sleeping alone. Before I met him I used to love being alone, now I just really miss and love him, and we can't talk on the phone when he's at his station because he's a "probitionary" firefighter, and he can get fired for ridiculous reasons Rolling Eyes

. He just called to say good night though, and that just makes me miss him more Crying or Very sad

. I wouldn't dare tell him how him being gone tares me up. I want to let him work and not have to worry about his overly emotional girlfriend. I'm sure I'll get used to it, but it's just so hard right now. Is anybody else's husband or boyfriend gone a lot? How do you deal with it? I'm normally reasonable person, but for some reason this is really affecting me terribly Crying or Very sad

Thanks for reading Smile

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 12:18 am

I'm so sorry that the change has been hard for you! Crying or Very sad

I can relate a bit...my BF went from working at the same company that I did where we could have lunch together every day to being out of work for a few months (and always being there when I got home from work) to working long hours with a long commute. I got used to him being home for those few months, so it's harder now when I get home hours before he does. It probably will just take getting used to, but I know what you mean...it's hard to go from seeing him all the time (especially when you worked together, too) to being apart more.

I deal with it by reading this forum - sometimes for hours on end! Not the best answer, perhaps...there's so much more I could be/should be doing, but I love it! I also used to go to the gym at night which I really need to get back in the habit of doing), and that pumps up the endorphins so it helps as well. Plus, I felt like I was doing something good for myself, and that's a good feeling.

Sorry I wasn't much help, but I'm sending hugs your way! Hope it gets better very soon. Smile

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 12:58 am

Before i met my last boyfriend (who's my hb now) i was alone for a quite long time. i was a very happy single, busy in the work, with lots of hobbies in my private life, travelling a lot. My hb travels a lot for his work and though he's never off home for longer than a week at once, but rather he's on business trips every week for 1-3 days (and nights). I can cope with it perfectly because :
- i'm pretty busy myself
- i still have my hobbies
- when he's not at home i use the time to meet friends (so when he's home again i can spend the time with him)
- i have two cats, they're perfect fellows for lonely nights
- i have EDS and when he's not at home i can "cruise" here without guilty conscience (otherwise he keeps saying "stop chetting, come and talk to ME")

rgds,
lin23

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 5:11 am

Thank you both for your kind words! It's a relef to know other people are surviving through the same situation Smile

Only 12 more hours to go Brick wall

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 7:14 am

I understand what you're going through. I know how difficult it is to love a person and to have to be without them. My husband and I lived 90 miles apart for six months (he was going to school in Marietta and I was working in Macon) and only saw each other on weekends. Ugh!! But we got through it with very frequent phone calls during the week. That's really silly that you guys can't talk to each other when he's at the station! Crying or Very sad

All of my best wishes to you in your situation.

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 8:12 am

Awww dealated, it's tough isn't it? My husband has to go to Asia for business a few times a year, and when he's gone it's usually for a few weeks at a time. The first time he went away after we got married I cried a lot, but eventually it gets easier, I promise. I think you'll start to feel better too, but I know right now you're really having a hard time. We're here if you need us!^-^

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 8:30 am

My Boyfriend and I live 45 minutes apart, so we don't get to see each other every day. Usually just on weekends, or odd days during the week. It's hard, and I do get lonely, but I just think of when I'll get to see him next, and I feel better. Just remember it's only temporary! Girls, we can be very emotional, can't we? Laughing

free skin care · Sat Nov 04, 2006 9:17 am

Boy, do I know how you feel! My husband's in Montréal so it is sometimes months before we see each other. Smile

It is hard but just know that eventually, things will shake out.

free skin care · Mon Nov 06, 2006 9:40 pm

Dealated,
My husband works for the government and he's on overnights almost 3 days a week. I don't have any family here so I got a dog, then I had a baby and that was really hard. when my baby was 3mo old my husband left for a month and I worked full time w/o sleep!!! (I'm not suggesting u have a baby, maybe a pet) I also spend countless hours reading EDS posts or researching chinese herbs and skincare. I also am training for a marathon. We've been married 4yrs now and I look forward to the days I have to myself now! Ha Ha Laughing

free skin care · Mon Nov 06, 2006 9:54 pm

My husband goes to Asia 4 to 6 times a year, 2 weeks each trip. He travels in the States at least 10 times a year, between 3 days to a week. I LOVE IT!!!

I only need to worry my 2 kids and I can spend all my time at EDS!!! Nobody nags me if I wore pajamas all day during weekend. Nobody nags me if I did not cook..... Dancing

Automatic Message

If this is your first visit to the EDS Forums please take the time to register. Registration is required for you to post on the forums. Registration will also give you the ability to track messages of interest, send private messages to other users, participate in Gift Certificates draws and enjoy automatic discounts for shopping at our online store. Registration is free and takes just a few seconds to complete.

Click Here to join our community.

If you are already a registered member on the forums, please login to gain full access to the site.