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Fri Jan 12, 2007 6:51 pm |
Happy Friday everyone
Not so happy for me though. I've been dwelling and stressed about getting older such that I keep perusing this forum and also the makeupalley.com forum and reviews trying to find the most effective things to slow or reverse the aging. I am 36 and I feel like I've been aging too quickly in the past 6 months b/c I spend all day in front of beauty forums trying to find what works and what doesn't. Can dwelling on "getting older" really manifest into physical aging? I think I need to get help b/c I am really depressed every time I look into the mirror. Seems more sagging and wrinkles.
Somebody please enlighten me and tell me any stories about mind over body and how I should stop worrying.
Thanks! |
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Fri Jan 12, 2007 7:48 pm |
Hi Librarygirl! I think when we obsess over something like this and we look in the mirror we see all of our flaws exaggerated. Your probably being too hard on yourself and also seem to be suffering from depression. Maybe stress from other things in your life is manifesting itself in this way? You are beautiful, no matter what. Always remember that. And remember that you are your own worse critic. No one sees what you see when you look in the mirror.
Worrying and obsessing will not make you look younger, but enjoying the things you love will. Relax. Life is too short and precious to waste one moment.
I say this from experience. I've been there, done that. |
_________________ To Love and to be Loved... what greator Joy can there be? |
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Fri Jan 12, 2007 7:57 pm |
anomaly wrote: |
Hi Librarygirl! I think when we obsess over something like this and we look in the mirror we see all of our flaws exaggerated. Your probably being too hard on yourself and also seem to be suffering from depression. Maybe stress from other things in your life is manifesting itself in this way? You are beautiful, no matter what. Always remember that. And remember that you are your own worse critic. No one sees what you see when you look in the mirror.
Worrying and obsessing will not make you look younger, but enjoying the things you love will. Relax. Life is too short and precious to waste one moment.
I say this from experience. I've been there, done that. |
Ditto. |
_________________ Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says, "Oh Crap, She's up!" Unknown |
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Fri Jan 12, 2007 8:03 pm |
Whenever we stress about anything it has a negative effect on our entire well being, not only just our appearance. Stress is the major cause of disease so it's really important to learn to not "sweat the small stuff" and to focus on the positive side of life. Smile - it's good for you! |
_________________ Global Butterfly & Certified Aromatherapist/Holisitc Therapist with a passion for travel and natural health. |
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Fri Jan 12, 2007 9:30 pm |
Thanks gals!!! I really needed the lift.
My post Jan 1 resolution is to stop obsessing. I agree that it is b/c I have other problems (outside of appearance) that are manifesting itself into something else. |
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Fri Jan 12, 2007 9:37 pm |
librarygirl wrote: |
Thanks gals!!! I really needed the lift.
My post Jan 1 resolution is to stop obsessing. I agree that it is b/c I have other problems (outside of appearance) that are manifesting itself into something else. |
So its just easier to pick on something we think is wrong with our own self because we think we can control it. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 4:22 am |
36 is not old so do not stress get some good anti aging creams as doing something about lines etc helps or maybe a few facials and stay health life is precious and how I wish I was 36 again |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 5:20 am |
Sometimes I feel a real dread about just losing my looks, slowly but surely.
I enumerate all my weak points, that years ago werent there.
I feel invisible and as if I'm trying too hard and may as well resign myself to the process of losing it.
Fortunately when I feel like this, I know I'm in a black mood, rather than facing "The Truth" and that I need to spend time with friends who make me laugh, and people who love me, and ignite my inner light that stops me being invisible. Then I remember that there are plenty of magnetic and wonderful older and old women, who have wisdom and radiance because of who they are, as well as because of what they do. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 1:18 pm |
The time you spend obsessing is wasted and only makes you feel worse. It is helpful sometimes to step away from the forums and work on your overall health and vitality, and spend your time doing things that make you feel good and uplifted.
Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for what I have learned here and I think I look better for it. But with every year that goes by (I'm 49) I'm more conscious of the enjoyment and pleasure I am getting--or not getting--from what I do. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 2:02 pm |
I won't reiterate the wise words that have already been expressed here, but I will advise you to go work out! There's nothing more energizing, plumping, and revitalising to the skin, especially after sitting at a computer all day long, than some good old running, brisk walking, spinning, yoga, pilates, or swimming... The blood will be pumped right into your skin and you will feel luminous from the inside out...
--avalange |
_________________ http://newnaturalbeauty.tumblr.com/ 37, light-toned olive skin, broken caps, normal skin. My staples: Osea cleansing milk, Algae Oil, Advanced Protection Cream, Eyes & Lips, Tata Harper, Julie Hewett makeup, Amazing Cosmetics Powder, & By Terry Light Expert, Burnout, and daily inversion therapy and green smoothies! |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 2:14 pm |
I totally agree with everything that Avalange said. Also, dance. It's good for the soul.
avalange wrote: |
I won't reiterate the wise words that have already been expressed here, but I will advise you to go work out! There's nothing more energizing, plumping, and revitalising to the skin, especially after sitting at a computer all day long, than some good old running, brisk walking, spinning, yoga, pilates, or swimming... The blood will be pumped right into your skin and you will feel luminous from the inside out...
--avalange |
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_________________ Best, Jeannine (40s, fair skin, hazel eyes, sensitive skin). To fight the dread lemming sickness, I promise not to rave about a product until I have used it for a long while. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 2:46 pm |
It is scientifically proven that excessive worrying or stressing about anything WILL age you.
When you experience stress, your body produces cortisol, a hormone naturally produced by your adrenal glands. Cortisol is the major age-accelerating hormone within the brain. It increases aging as well as free radical formation within brain tissue (free radicals are harmful breakdown products produced during cell metabolism which accelerate aging). Cortisol is bad for your body & your health.
The second important aging & longevity bio-marker is DHEA, also produced by your adrenal glands. With stress, the levels drop dramatically. DHEA levels in the blood are a key determinant of physiological age. The lower the DHEA level, the more susceptible your are to aging. DHEA acts as a buffer against stress-related hormones (such as cortisol), which is why as you get older you are more susceptible to stress & disease.
So, even when you don't feel your best, try to maintain a positive attitude. It will serve you well in your age maintenance. I'd recommend meditating or doing yoga/pilates to help elevate your mood. Positive affirmations are also always helpful to get through a rough day. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 3:21 pm |
Yes I think stressing can really make you age faster.. Smile! It's really good cause you're really exercizing your face! |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 5:50 pm |
You are only as old as you feel.....I feel 30 and people always say I definately do not look my age? Do I look 30, who knows....but I doubt it!!!!!!!!!! |
_________________ Irish (dry and sensitive) 50 (menopausal)dark hair/green eyes |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 6:52 pm |
I tend to get worried too, but the problem is my skin is so sensitive, I can't take alot of anti-aging products which leads to alot of frustration for me. Just tell yourself to relax but not slack off on skincare. |
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Sat Jan 13, 2007 8:27 pm |
leidon wrote: |
It is scientifically proven that excessive worrying or stressing about anything WILL age you.
When you experience stress, your body produces cortisol, a hormone naturally produced by your adrenal glands. Cortisol is the major age-accelerating hormone within the brain. It increases aging as well as free radical formation within brain tissue (free radicals are harmful breakdown products produced during cell metabolism which accelerate aging). Cortisol is bad for your body & your health.
The second important aging & longevity bio-marker is DHEA, also produced by your adrenal glands. With stress, the levels drop dramatically. DHEA levels in the blood are a key determinant of physiological age. The lower the DHEA level, the more susceptible your are to aging. DHEA acts as a buffer against stress-related hormones (such as cortisol), which is why as you get older you are more susceptible to stress & disease.
So, even when you don't feel your best, try to maintain a positive attitude. It will serve you well in your age maintenance. I'd recommend meditating or doing yoga/pilates to help elevate your mood. Positive affirmations are also always helpful to get through a rough day. |
Thanks everyone. Leidon, the biochemical explanation is a very good one. You know, I did my Paula Abdul "Shut Up & Dance" DVD exercise video and boy did I feel a whole lot better. I also feel that I look a lot less haggard today since I exercised and tried not to think about it so much. Positive affirmations, positive affirmations, and feeling that you are as young as the day you left college. Sometimes I feel invisible but I should not let that get to me.
I think a lot of the stress comes from me not working now since I am currently looking for a job (which is prob. why I'm reading forums all day), my husband doesn't want to have kids, and I am thinking about moving back to NY and divorcing my hubby (because he doesn't want kids with me). All of these are really stressing me and I think the cortisol is starting to get to me and leading me to a depression. This is definitely not good for anyone's health and appearance.
Two good examples of how your well-being affects your health: 1) My ex-boss had a close friend whose teenage daughter died from a lake accident involving a waterski. The father had aged about 15 years a week after the incident. I was told that he had more wrinkles, gray hair, and was very haggard looking. I don't know if this has to do with crying a lot but I've been to a lot of funerals and have never seen anyone age so significantly even after all the crying. 2) A friend of mine 10 years ago was dating a guy who was verbally abusing her and also was very manipulative. They lived together and she was not looking so great. After she moved out and left him, not only did she lose some weight but she had a really nice glow to her. She looked like a 20 year old even though she was 28. She really transformed into a pretty woman several months after she moved out. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 3:48 am |
now i am worried about it
not lifting enough ,everywhere is going to loose |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 10:32 am |
I worry about aging as well, but I can get obsessive about it. When I first started seeing the lines, I used to routinely look at my face to see if I had aged more than the day before. And sure enough I see more lines. Today, I notice that I may have more lines but I try not to obsesse about it. I'm just hoping that the things that I use today will help me out for tomorrow. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 10:34 am |
Spending all day in front of beauty forums!
Do you have too much spare time? Don't you work or have hobbits? LOL |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 10:35 am |
Sorry about the double posts. But I think everyone else is right. Get some exercise and a hobbit. Hope you don't get too stressed out about things going on in your life.
Maybe it's time to start using retinoids too. I am in my late 20s and don't even have a fine line yet but I was thinking of using them a while ago. I guess I am too young for that. There are better means of prevention for people like me. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 10:58 am |
This is an awesome typo! I want a hobbit. plug-in-babe, you made my day
plug-in-babe wrote: |
.... But I think everyone else is right. Get some exercise and a hobbit. |
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_________________ Best, Jeannine (40s, fair skin, hazel eyes, sensitive skin). To fight the dread lemming sickness, I promise not to rave about a product until I have used it for a long while. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 11:16 am |
Well, I was trying to type "hobbies". But whatever... as long as you understand. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 11:24 am |
Oh, I'm not making fun of you at all. Typos are human. Of course, I knew what you meant. I'm just laughing at the wonderful result. I'm a fan of Lord of the Rings, so it's really amusing to me.
plug-in-babe wrote: |
Well, I was trying to type "hobbies". But whatever... as long as you understand. |
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_________________ Best, Jeannine (40s, fair skin, hazel eyes, sensitive skin). To fight the dread lemming sickness, I promise not to rave about a product until I have used it for a long while. |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 11:50 am |
You are TOO YOUNG TO REMEMBER ( ), but the entire world watched Jimmy Carter age twenty years during the Iran Hostage Crisis. It was astonishing. Week by week. . .
I am happier than I've ever been now, in my 50s. It is NOT a myth, and I am NOT kidding. (I had the husband and children/no children worries. I no longer do. Thank God.) Your 30s are tough, girl.
I was never called "beautiful." But was called "pretty" a lot. I've been called "beautiful" hundreds of times since I hit 50. Why?
Because I'm happy. I have few regrets (we always wonder "waht if?", but that's not the same as regrets). I like myself a great deal. I don't hang around toxic people. I know "up with what I will not put."
And yet. These boards sometimes make ME wonder if I shoud be worried about my looks or skin or age. They can definitely skew your perspective.
Live Life. Live where you want, with whom you want. Do what you want. Shower the people you love with Love. Create your best life. |
_________________ tenderlovingwork.com, astonishing handmade gifts |
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Sun Jan 14, 2007 5:02 pm |
Jeannine wrote: |
Oh, I'm not making fun of you at all. Typos are human. Of course, I knew what you meant. I'm just laughing at the wonderful result. I'm a fan of Lord of the Rings, so it's really amusing to me.
plug-in-babe wrote: |
Well, I was trying to type "hobbies". But whatever... as long as you understand. |
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OMG! That's it! Get a hobbit! What if getting a hobbit is the cure for everything?!?!? I'm totally joking, too - I'm a LOTR fan too, and having a hobbit around sounds like it might just be what we all need!
Sidda wrote: |
You are TOO YOUNG TO REMEMBER ( ), but the entire world watched Jimmy Carter age twenty years during the Iran Hostage Crisis. It was astonishing. Week by week. . .
I am happier than I've ever been now, in my 50s. It is NOT a myth, and I am NOT kidding. (I had the husband and children/no children worries. I no longer do. Thank God.) Your 30s are tough, girl.
I was never called "beautiful." But was called "pretty" a lot. I've been called "beautiful" hundreds of times since I hit 50. Why?
Because I'm happy. I have few regrets (we always wonder "waht if?", but that's not the same as regrets). I like myself a great deal. I don't hang around toxic people. I know "up with what I will not put."
And yet. These boards sometimes make ME wonder if I shoud be worried about my looks or skin or age. They can definitely skew your perspective.
Live Life. Live where you want, with whom you want. Do what you want. Shower the people you love with Love. Create your best life. |
Sidda, you ROCK! I love your attitude and POV!
Truthfully, ladies, I think we are so much more in control of our lives that the world leads us to believe we are. We create our own everything! If you sit around saying "I'm getting so old, I'm looking so bad" - you WILL. If you are obsessed over the negative, it will overwhelm your life. Negative thoughts have a tendency to snowball and before you know it, you're in a blue - over everything in your life. So, everytime you have a negative thought, force yourself to STOP, and then think an opposite, good thought for every negative one.
Librarygirl, you're having big issues with your job/husband/whether you want to move or not, etc. This is a lot to deal with at once. Just know that whatever you decide, it will be the right choice for you and what you need in your life. You are not a stupid girl, and you will not make a decision without considering all possibilities. If you are in an unhappy situation with your husband and are having issues over something as fundamental as having kids, then you know what you need to do. When you make whatever changes you are considering, things will be so much better for you, but you don't have to torture yourself in the meantime by turning all this stress on yourself and worrying about your looks/getting older, etc. Its what women do - we turn it all back on ourselves to bear the burden. I say dump the burden where it deserves to be dumped and leave it there! |
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