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pretty flowers
 
Joined: 14 Jul 2008
Posts: 0
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Mon Jul 14, 2008 2:51 pm  |
I am 27 years old. After graduated, I moved to Vancouver for about 2 years now and had been working full-time. My company head office is in Toronto and the team I am working with has only 3 people.
I am sure manys here agree with me that it’s hard to find girl friends. I’ve been trying to make some new friends but most (99%) are guys and most guys want more than just friendship.
I like parties but also like out door activities. But I don’t get a chance to go to beach or go hiking... I don’t like to do those things alone either…
I am so tired of looking but still want friends. Can anyone suggest me some media to reach or make new friends?
Lying on a beach in the sun with girlfriends seems a dream for me now. 
Many thanks. |
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Mon Jul 14, 2008 3:43 pm |
Hi pretty flowers, I get what u mean too. It's hard to make frds as we get older. I work in a specialist's office and it's hard for me to make friends as there're only 2ppl including me in the office...the doctor & me. There're other ppl on the same floor but they're much older than me like 40yrs + so it's hard to find something in common.
Also, I agreed with you that I have more guy frds than girl frds but most of those guy frds have motives... like what u said, they want to be more than just frds. I have 2sisters, one older & younger. It seems like they're my only good frds. I talked to them most of the time about my stuff, shopping, or just hanging out with them. But I also want to make some real frds outside besides my sisters.
I noticed from your post that you just moved to Vancouver now? BTW, I live in Vancouver too =) |
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Mon Jul 14, 2008 3:48 pm |
oh it seems I haven't answer your question yet... how to make more frds..
well, perhaps join some of your current frds on some dinner gatherings or activities? I also find that volunteering or attending church will make u some frds although I didn't do that myself.
Go take a class that you enjoy and like. Perhpas you'll be able to make a frd or two that share the same interest as u  |
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havana8
Moderator
Joined: 09 Sep 2005
Posts: 3449
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Mon Jul 14, 2008 7:52 pm |
I'm here to tell you the idea that it's harder to make friends as you get older is BUNK!
It is different, and you have to make the effort. That's all. Think about it, for your first 25 years, you are thrown together with many people your age, with your same concerns, on a daily basis, and you spend hours and hours together. Once you are out of school, you have to SEEK OUT those situations, that's all. There are lots of ways -- volunteering (and not just walking dogs). Volunteer to do things that will bring you in touch with PEOPLE, lots of people. Work on a benefit, join committees, neighborhood councils, church, etc. Go to your local farmer's market, craft shows. Take a part time job that will bring you in touch with a specific clientele. I met many friends volunteering for the local NPR station -- "like minds." Work a couple of nights a week at a local cafe. Book clubs at your local bookstore. There are lots of local groups set up on the internet for just these purposes. Google "Vancouver" and "Meet people." "activities" "field trips". Local college extension courses, Learning Annex, yoga classes. Hullo?
You think it's hard, but it is NOT. Gear yourself up and get out there. Remember, you weren't particularly excited about going to school every day, either. But you DID it. Do NOT mistake laziness for loneliness. You are no longer in school and it will not be done for you. You must SEEK OUT the people and friendships. And don't get discouraged. Think of how many many people you went to school with, and how many real friends did you make?
Don't overlook neighbors and laundromats and Starbuck's, etc. Have dinner parties. Two 20-somethings I know (from my part-time Trader Joe's job  ) have a Community Dinner every second Thursday of the month. They were just really determined to DO IT. It started off verrry slowly, but the last dinner, we had over 40 people show up!
And guess what? It's easier now than EVER before. The internet is your friend. If you go to work with 3 people and then you go home and watch TV... yeah. It's hard to make friends. 
Circulate.
Just Do It. |
_________________
tenderlovingwork.com, astonishing handmade gifts |
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Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:59 am |
| Sidda wrote: |
I'm here to tell you the idea that it's harder to make friends as you get older is BUNK!
It is different, and you have to make the effort. That's all. Think about it, for your first 25 years, you are thrown together with many people your age, with your same concerns, on a daily basis, and you spend hours and hours together. Once you are out of school, you have to SEEK OUT those situations, that's all. There are lots of ways -- volunteering (and not just walking dogs). Volunteer to do things that will bring you in touch with PEOPLE, lots of people. Work on a benefit, join committees, neighborhood councils, church, etc. Go to your local farmer's market, craft shows. Take a part time job that will bring you in touch with a specific clientele. I met many friends volunteering for the local NPR station -- "like minds." Work a couple of nights a week at a local cafe. Book clubs at your local bookstore. There are lots of local groups set up on the internet for just these purposes. Google "Vancouver" and "Meet people." "activities" "field trips". Local college extension courses, Learning Annex, yoga classes. Hullo?
You think it's hard, but it is NOT. Gear yourself up and get out there. Remember, you weren't particularly excited about going to school every day, either. But you DID it. Do NOT mistake laziness for loneliness. You are no longer in school and it will not be done for you. You must SEEK OUT the people and friendships. And don't get discouraged. Think of how many many people you went to school with, and how many real friends did you make?
Don't overlook neighbors and laundromats and Starbuck's, etc. Have dinner parties. Two 20-somethings I know (from my part-time Trader Joe's job ) have a Community Dinner every second Thursday of the month. They were just really determined to DO IT. It started off verrry slowly, but the last dinner, we had over 40 people show up!
And guess what? It's easier now than EVER before. The internet is your friend. If you go to work with 3 people and then you go home and watch TV... yeah. It's hard to make friends.
Circulate.
Just Do It. |
Hey Sidda, this is great! Love it for my "49 yo hard to step out of the box" kind of personality!! It takes me a little longer but I am getting there! Do you think this should be added to that "... feeling lonely..." thread too? |
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Tue Jul 15, 2008 9:13 pm |
Done.
Thanks for the suggestion. |
_________________
tenderlovingwork.com, astonishing handmade gifts |
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pretty flowers
Joined: 14 Jul 2008
Posts: 0
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Wed Jul 16, 2008 3:39 pm |
Thanks so much, Stardustdy, havana8, Sidda and blesstd!
Your suggestion was great! I already made notes and bullet points... : )
Stardustdy: Yes, I am living in Vancouver... Do you/your friends like out door activities/sport games/beaches too? : ) |
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Thu Jul 17, 2008 12:05 am |
Hi pretty flowers, I do like outdoor activities sometimes depending on the weather and mood. But since after I found this site and realized the damage that UV rays can do... I tried to stay out of the beach as much as possible now even though it might sound a bit extreme 
So pretty flowers, u like to spend your time outdoors usually? |
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