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Ladies, please share what gets you through hard times......

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Joined: 09 Mar 2011
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Tue Jan 06, 2015 8:06 am      Reply with quote
Swampy, is it possible for you to arrange "a room of one's own"?

If you have a hobby, make it for that purpose with the addition of only one chair with a good light for reading or any other activity you enjoy.

I am a great believer that both separate and together times do a part in nourishing the relationship.

Maybe hubby needs a hobby!

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Joined: 05 Jan 2015
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Tue Jan 06, 2015 12:02 pm      Reply with quote
Mismis: Thanks for replying so quickly Smile I do have a couple of rooms of my own, but now that we have our grand niece n her two babies living with us for a few months, they have taken up hubby's tv room. He is now in my space, which is the most comfortable place to read.
I am not able to physically do the hobbies I enjoy doing, other than reading and crocheting for small periods. Being cooped up in the house all day is depressing, this cold weather causes my limbs to ache even more. I miss my walks and working out at the gym.
Hubby is no longer interested in his hobbies of fishing, hunting and visiting friends. Just watches tv and underfoot all day.
Hubby will visit his sister and cousins. Unfortunately we live in the midst of his relatives, which causes many problems in our marriage.
When he is not working and is home for a long period, he will get depressed and crabby. It is like crossing paths with an angry bear Razz
Hopefully now that our grand niece n babies left to visit her family for a couple of months things will settle down a bit. Hubby has his TV room back for a little while, that should make him happy.
Thank you for allowing to vent my frustrations, it helps. Some days I feel swamped (thus the name swampy) with negative feelings, which I don't like. I too love my husband, but some days it is hard to like him. I imagine he feels that way about me too Wink
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Tue Mar 03, 2015 6:06 pm      Reply with quote
I have had a very rough 16 years. Three times nearly dying (cancer, stroke, 11 hernias, trauma, and HELLP syndrome during childbirth) twice I have had open wounds for around a year. I now take Nucynta for residual pain from the cancer treatments. My dad died during this period and my mom was in rehab for a year. These are things that helped me. I worked full time through most of this and a coworker really helped out.

1. When you need help from others ASK. When you feel out of control counseling or talking to someone not in your circle can help. Most areas have free services or support groups.

2. Give yourself lots of breaks, get massages, try guided imagery, learn breathing techniques.

3. Pets are great I have two dogs and they are amazing.

4. Find some exercise you enjoy. I once had a good DVD on chair yoga.

5. Keep a journal.

6. It is OK to be down sometimes. I hated it when I was in extreme pain and my DH said to smile!

7. Try books on tape when I was in too much pain to read or even watch TV a narrated book with headphones can put you in a new place.

8. Keep posting here. This is a nice forum. I used to post here probably over 14 years ago but life intervened. This is a well moderated forum that does not tolerate nasties.
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Fri Mar 27, 2015 8:53 am      Reply with quote
God gets me through the hard times. Seriously. He always has and always will! Very Happy

God Bless!

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Tue Oct 25, 2016 5:38 pm      Reply with quote
I meditate/visualize myself on a day in the future where I am recalling the hard time that felt like it would never end and then I visualize my future self saying to herself, " Wow, I thought that would never, ever end, but it did!"

Most of those trying times do end.
The trick is not throwing in the towel beforehand.
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Tue Jan 31, 2017 11:48 pm      Reply with quote
Alcohol and shopping. Both are helpful but not at the same time lol. That is very damaging. I do love to workout hard and listen to very loud music. That can really pull me out of a depression. But when my husband was in the hospital and almost died from Pnuemonia and I was all alone, it was alcohol, sadly.

47, former sunworshipper, skincare addict, oily T-zone, fair skinned, love Vita A, some hyperpigmentation, microneedler.
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Sat Apr 14, 2018 3:02 pm      Reply with quote
Honestly - only God is helping me. Connecting to love and pray. Really getting to grips with me. Forgiving - if I have hard feelings to anyone. Nothing else ever can help me more than connecting to God or universal Love - whatever you call it.

Going out to walk in nature - looking at the sky the majesty of sunrises and sunsets...

And than there is music...

And finally if I am angry, jogging - if I need focus - yoga...

Inspiration --- books...
And always - God.

Wherever you are things can turn around - in the most miraculous ways when you dare to love... God bless

“When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy.” Rumi
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Wed Sep 19, 2018 10:47 am
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