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Sun Feb 11, 2007 8:52 pm |
I received this from a friend today and just had to share it with you all. It holds much truth and many laughs!
Summary of Life
GREAT TRUTHS THAT CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . . having a driver licence.
At age 35 success is . . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 70 success is . . . having a driver licence.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
PS.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.
Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*
Take the time to live!!!
Life is too short. Dance naked.
Sharon x |
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Sun Feb 11, 2007 8:56 pm |
This is really cute. *smiles*
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
I always tend to SNEEZE, while getting my hair cut, NO MATTER WHAT!!
Thanks for sharing!
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Sun Feb 11, 2007 9:07 pm |
Thank you for sharing this! So many of them are so funny!
I really liked "SUCCESS" at different ages. I have to send this to my grandmother; she' 98 years old and I know that it would make her laugh.  |
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Sun Feb 11, 2007 9:46 pm |
Thanks girls. Tam I sent this to my Nan who is 90 years young and she said she chuckled so hard that piddling her pants became secondary to her heart surviving the belly laugh!! |
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Sun Feb 11, 2007 10:24 pm |
vava_gurl wrote: |
Thanks girls. Tam I sent this to my Nan who is 90 years young and she said she chuckled so hard that piddling her pants became secondary to her heart surviving the belly laugh!! |
She's a cutie! |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 12:59 am |
That's so funny and cute - thank you for sharing! |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 11:14 am |
I love the Santa Claus one - although I do hope that I don't begin to resemble him as I get older. A white beard and moustache would look just a little strange on me. I could do the red outfit with white trim, though.  |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 11:57 am |
Good advice! |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 12:26 pm |
Too cute! Thanks! |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 1:44 pm |
You're welcome girls!!  |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 1:56 pm |
THANK YOU |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:33 pm |
Thanks! The Santa thing is great
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PS.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way; BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day. |
I have to remind myself of this a lot!! |
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Mon Feb 12, 2007 4:11 pm |
Very cute and true! Thanks for cheering me up after a really overbooked brain-stretching day.  |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 2:34 pm |
I loved the Success one, very cute. |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 1:46 pm |
Thanks for the laugh! |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 1:53 pm |
This is too funny! And I know from experience that all the "truths" pertaining to cats are completely valid...
Mary  |
_________________ 43, Confirmed desert rat (Scottsdale, AZ), animal lover (3 kitties and a pup) and hopeless product junkie (I blame EDS...lol!) |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 2:04 pm |
Mary H. wrote: |
This is too funny! And I know from experience that all the "truths" pertaining to cats are completely valid...
Mary  |
Mary please tell me you didnt try to babptise yoiur cat!  |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 2:26 pm |
vava_gurl wrote: |
Mary H. wrote: |
This is too funny! And I know from experience that all the "truths" pertaining to cats are completely valid...
Mary  |
Mary please tell me you didnt try to babptise yoiur cat!  |
No...but I did try to bathe her, which was probably worse because there was water AND soap involved!
Mary  |
_________________ 43, Confirmed desert rat (Scottsdale, AZ), animal lover (3 kitties and a pup) and hopeless product junkie (I blame EDS...lol!) |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 2:31 pm |
Oh my goodness - I envisage it was not a pretty scene!! |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 2:39 pm |
vava_gurl wrote: |
Oh my goodness - I envisage it was not a pretty scene!! |
Yeah...most definitely NOT pretty! She howled like crazy, and I barely got her rinsed before she took off like a shot and hid under the bed for several hours. I felt horrible! Note to self: let cat do it's own grooming.
Mary  |
_________________ 43, Confirmed desert rat (Scottsdale, AZ), animal lover (3 kitties and a pup) and hopeless product junkie (I blame EDS...lol!) |
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Wed Feb 14, 2007 4:30 pm |
These are great!! Thanks for sharing! |
_________________ 40, fair skinned, dark hair, blue eyes |
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