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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:18 am  |
TO: All Employees
RE: Swearing at work  
It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the course
of normal conversation with their co-workers.
Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily
offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to
accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have
been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can
continue in an effective manner.
1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.
2 ) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?
4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.
5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!
6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.
7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___ing problem.
 TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?
9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.
10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn't you tell me sooner?
11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.
12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.
13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.
14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.
15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.
16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.
17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?
1 TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:30 am |
 
My DH curses a lot. I should show him this! Thanks for sharing! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:38 am |
| Thanks. I needed a laugh this morning as it is cold and very snowy here. Working with mostly men, I've heard a lot of those phrases! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:48 am |
| Love it! |
_________________
Location: Denmark. Me = 32, think I'm combo without oiliness + sometimes sensitive. Have noticed that skin doesn't heal as quickly anymore and I've developed fine lines around my eyes... Hormonal breakouts which are sometimes cystic. PCOS |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:59 am |
You're welcome.
I came home from a long trying day at work a couple of hours ago and found this. My how many times today some of those lines went through my head But took a deep breath, counted to 10 and silently blessed them for their unfortunate brain malfunction. Anyway it gave me a good laugh - just what I needed at the end of a way too crazy day!
I am aiming to get to bed before midnight so now it's time for a mountain of beauty sleep so that I wake up fresh and sweet and more gorgeous than ever before!!  Clearly I wont be rising until this time next week!! 
night girls & boys
Sharon x |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 4:05 am |
| Love it, love it, love it - definitely circulating this one around my office! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 4:10 am |
| HA HA too funny!! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 4:13 am |
| Ooops! I think I'm guilty of every single one of the "Instead of" phrases! And in a single day at the office! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 10:28 am |
LOL.... me TOO MermaidGirl. My potty mouth is famous; always has been.
My father used to say, "ahhhh katie has a face like an angel (of course! he's my dad, after all), and a mouth like a sailor!"
Thanks for posting that vava_. I put it up on the bulletin board here. I didn't think to sign it - I just posted it. So far, 3 different people have copied it and slipped it under my door! (n.b. chickenshits that they are, they snuck away after doing it ) |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 10:46 am |
Very funny.
Thanks. |
_________________
Early 50s, Skin: combin.,semi-sensitive, fair with occasional breakouts, some old acne scars, freckles, under-eye wrinkles; Redhead with hazel eyes |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 11:26 am |
| MermaidGirl wrote: |
| Ooops! I think I'm guilty of every single one of the "Instead of" phrases! And in a single day at the office! |
MermaidGirl, you're my hero! |
_________________
27, sensitive/reactive/acne prone skin, dark brown hair, blue eyes, possibly the palest woman alive... |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 12:06 pm |
| I think I'm going to print this out!!!! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 12:23 pm |
| LOL |
_________________
40, fair skinned, dark hair, blue eyes |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 12:54 pm |
| interesting. but in our office people normally don't swear infront of female employees. |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 1:12 pm |
| Too funny!! I'm going to circulate this to everyone at work also . |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 1:13 pm |
working tips !  |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 1:41 pm |
| katee wrote: |
| Thanks for posting that vava_. I put it up on the bulletin board here. I didn't think to sign it - I just posted it. So far, 3 different people have copied it and slipped it under my door! (n.b. chickenshits that they are, they snuck away after doing it ) |
Katee perhaps they felt a gentle anonymous reminder might do the trick - but of course only the bravest of the fools were chosen as they all clearly feared for their lives!!
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 2:48 pm |
| funny! I'm a big fan of the "F BOMB" and I use it a lot. I really need to cut it out....but sometimes nothing feels as good! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:11 pm |
| Olivia wrote: |
| funny! I'm a big fan of the "F BOMB" and I use it a lot. I really need to cut it out....but sometimes nothing feels as good! |
sometimes it does feel good to swear |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 3:14 pm |
| MermaidGirl wrote: |
| Ooops! I think I'm guilty of every single one of the "Instead of" phrases! And in a single day at the office! |
| Olivia wrote: |
| funny! I'm a big fan of the "F BOMB" and I use it a lot. I really need to cut it out....but sometimes nothing feels as good! |
I TOTALLY agree with you Olivia!
All kidding aside, ladies, I really don't curse that much (but when I do ... pheeewwww lawdy, watch out!  It usually means I'm "highly p*ssed off" as my Greek history professor would say!). My best guy friend and I decided a couple years ago as our New Year's Resolution to stop cursing so much because it just sounds so crass. My best girl friend swears like a long shoreman, so she is my shining example of what NOT to do. Literally every other word out of her mouth is the "F" word in some form or another, and let me tell you, she is really creative! Oddly, I understand everything she is saying even when "F" something is her only descriptive ... 
But I still do agree with Olivia! |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 5:49 pm |
| Those are great! Now, if I could just keep my cool enough to think the cleaner versions instead of the "instead ofs". |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 6:20 pm |
| I've read that one so many times and each time it makes me laugh. |
_________________
Global Butterfly & Certified Aromatherapist/Holisitc Therapist with a passion for travel and natural health. |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 6:25 pm |
I love those!!! |
_________________
Aimee3 |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 9:44 pm |
haha...I saw this before and it's one of my favorites.
However my bf told me that people at his work (law firm) are rather bad. One of his partners said to him, "You're a train wreck waiting to happen, and when it happens, I'll f*ck you dead." I cannot believe these so-called professionals are so vulgar. |
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Tue Feb 13, 2007 11:05 pm |
| bkkgirl wrote: |
haha...I saw this before and it's one of my favorites.
However my bf told me that people at his work (law firm) are rather bad. One of his partners said to him, "You're a train wreck waiting to happen, and when it happens, I'll f*ck you dead." I cannot believe these so-called professionals are so vulgar. |
Yeah, professional or not, some people will always swear profusely. A few days ago, my BLAW class was discussing hiring upon disability and what it entails. Well, someone asked him if lawyers are any better at these statutes since they're surrounded with them. His reply, "F no! We're even worse than the beginning sole proprietor/llc."
Thanks for the laugh. This will be circulating my SO's office tomorrow . |
_________________
20; light/ fair-toned with freckles on cheeks/nose since I could remember; combo skin w/ Oily forehead, chin prone to acne. Green/brown eyes; growing to love my medium/ dark brown hair. |
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