So desperate I did something terrible :-(
EDS Skin Care Forums Forum Index » Skin Care and Makeup Forum

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:06 pm

Im not really sure where to begin or what to say or why i am saying. Maybe because you ladies dont know me

Ive been really struggling with how i look. Infact from a child ive had this ugly image. Over the past years its gotten worse as im looking so old. My eyes are very crepey underneath and ive got real puffy bags. Ive just turned 40 and look years older than my age. For a long time ive just wanted my life over. Im sad single and lonely and whose going to want someone who looks older. most guys want young ladies or at least someone who looks young not one looking so old. Eventhug i was in a long relationship some years ago i was really single throughout. He messed around with other girls continously. Why did i stay? maybe i thought that was all i was worth. Ive only ever wanted someone to love me for me but ive never had it. Now ive reached 40 (today actually and ive spent that totally alone and in bed because i couldnt face anyone seeing me and how old i look) ive been lower than ever with how i look. so much so, and this is the bad bit, that i tried to end it and failed miserably. Sad thing is i know theres a good chance ill try again because i just dont want to live my life looking like this old thing that i am. I keep trying creams but nothing seems to work. I only have miniumum money to spend and what i do goes on creams etc or i save up for them. I use cellular vit c serum and psf ha serum, decleor hydrating eye cream and boots time delay firming moisturiser. at night im using retin a. My bags and crepiness under my eyes just get worse. Ive also got the baby quaser andim using that but again im not seeing any results.

I just dont know what to do. I go to bed everynight and pray to god i dont wake up.

Some may laugh at my stupidy or weakness but i cant help the way i feel which has been most of my life. I do suffer with depression but seems only when im real low about myself.

And im sure people are going to suggest cosmetic surgery. Trust me if i had the money i would have it done straight away but thats not an option for me. i live alone and earn a small wage so my rent and bills take nearly everything.

Im sorry if ive rambled on. Im just looking for someone to help i guess with what i can do to help me not look so old

Sally x

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:19 pm

I'm not going to recommend any beauty device or cream. The best beauty comes from within - from smiling eyes and a face with glows with self-confidence. Age can never take away the radiance of a vibrant being!

I'm gonna recommend that you begin finding good things about yourself, start with small things and begin a list. Until you love yourself, you probably won't find it in the world. I've learned this the hard way myself.

I wish you the best on your journey.

I don't believe that "ending your life" is the end of the journey. You can not run away from yourself. Look at yourself with kind eyes and begin loving yourself.

There is a book I would recommend by Esther and Jerry Hicks called "Ask and It is Given". You can also find some free resources on their site: www.abraham-hicks.com
They talk about keeping a journal of positive aspects. That is similar to what I am suggesting to you.

Many blessings!

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:29 pm

Is it possible for you to get a psychiatrist? (it may be too expensive)

I second lunarmm's suggestions, except that I'm not familiar with that book, but I'm sure that it's a good suggestion as well.

What works for me when I'm depressed is to exercise more. I know it's cliche, but it really does work, exercise releases those endorphins that really do make you feel good.

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 12:56 pm

Hi Lunarmm and Nimue

Thank you for youre replies.

I do try to be positive but when i see how old i look for my age it really gets me so down maybe more than some because being single as you get older, or so it seems it harder. If you saw me you would be surprised to know how i felt on the inside. I smile alot on the outside. People always comment on me smiling but no one really knows me and how im truely feeling. i will look into the book lunaramm

Nimue my dr has referred me to see a therapist. Im under two different ones at the moment. One is kind of keeping an eye on me so to speak and the other is assessing me to see which therapy wuld be best. Thing is i know deep down if i improved how i looked i would be happier. Or at least if i could find somethings that could help my skin in looking better instead of older would be good. I was really thin many years ago which made me look older. Once id put some weight on it made me look better in the face which did wonders for me at the time with how i felt about myself.

thankyou again for speaking with me and giving me some good advice xxx

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:03 pm

These are good recommendations. And, speaking as a person who has had clinical depression all my life -- and been on medications (with varying degrees of success) since lllooong before it was trendy -- I do understand what you're going through. I was a candidate for ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) TWICE.

Please, please, please, seek out a doctor, couselour, therapist. You are very depressed; I can hear it in your words. The tinny echo of hopelessness and... hopelessness. When you spend the day in bed (and I have spent many days in bed, all of which I wish I had back), you have a MEDICAL PROBLEM. There are programs and sliding payment scales and lots of help out there. You have to summon up the courage and energy from SOMEWHERE. (I won't tell you to "pull yourself up from your bootstraps;" I am painfully aware that you have no bootstraps right now) and look on the internet or in the yellow pages for professional help. Google your town and "therapy sliding scale" or "low cost."

Just do that much. A tiny effort will make you feel remarkably more empowered and in control. If you are not up to that, answer this:

What can you do RIGHT NOW that will make you feel more competent and productive and proud? I remember one day, for me, it was "clean out the cat box." Which I did. I wasn't up to doing the dishes. But I could dump out the cat box. I thought I'd give it "a try." And I stayed up that day. That tiny effort started a string of tasks over the next few weeks and months that got me better.

You will not be happier with how you look until you are happier with how you feel (NOT the other way around). You are caught in a downward spiral of negative thinking, and you need serious intervention to put the brakes on.

I can tell you that the Universe did not put you here to suffer, that you will feel better when you think in terms of what you can give to the world, rather than what you can get, that your thinking is clouded with chemicals and electrical patterns that you cannot WILL your way out of -- any more than a diabetic can WILL herself into producing natural insulin.

Please. For the good of the WORLD. What tiny, tiny thing can you do RIGHT NOW to make yourself feel better? Take a shower? Research depression at the library? Call someone and talk about nothing at all -- just check in and ask how THEY are?

I have spent many, many days and YEARS where you are. Completely paralyzed. It is not how life was meant to be.

And, may I add? Being alone is NOT the worst thing in the world. Unless you are with someone who abuses you with catastrophic thinking and negative talk and self-abuse.

Treat yourself at LEAST as kindly as you would treat a ten year old child. Who you loved.

Don't try to change the world or your looks or your life all at once. Do one tiny thing today. Just one. I know it's terribly overwhelming to even think about. Sometimes my only way out was this three-step thought process:

1. Accept your feelings (don't ignore or dismiss them)
2. Know your purpose (turn on the shower, stand up and leave your room)
3. Do what needs to be done. (just go through the motions, to start)

This small springboard will change the chemicals in your brain and start to clear your thinking.

Do what you must to feel better. Feelings are NOT facts.

Honey. I'll be 53 on August 10. People respond sooo much more positively to me now than when I was 28 -- and "gorgeous." Connection -- with yourself, with others, with your God/Universe -- is what life is all about.

Be generous. Give.

I wish you strength and peace.

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:11 pm

Hi Sidda

ah thank you

I do suffer with depression. Have been on medication for many years now. I had anorexia fromthe age of 16 up until about 7 years ago. All because i couldnt stand how ugly i ws so i controlled my weight instead. Ive recently been referred to a thrapist - 2 in fact - and they say i have body dismorphic disorder. Im trying to like myself but when i see this old face looking back its hard. i know when i was really thin, looking back i can see i looked awful now and when i put the weight on i actually started to not hate my face so much. As im getting older and looking older than my years im feeling all the more worse again. I know if i could help my appearence to look a bit better and not so old I would start to feel better. Thats just how i work i guess.

You have all sent me lovely encouraging messages and i thank you all so much
xxx

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:27 pm

Hi Sally,

Please note, I said: smiling eyes. You can smile on your face all you want but the smile has to come from inside from true joy.

If you have been diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder, know that your thoughts are clouded and you can't even see the real YOU right now.

I'm glad that you are seeking professional advice. I do highly recommend the Abraham-Hicks and other materials focused on Law of Attraction (sometimes shortened to LOA). Focus on the good in your life and what you DO WANT versus all your thoughts focused on what you DO NOT want. As you feel gratitude for the good things, you will start feeling better.

At this point, I don't recommend focusing on your external features as your thoughts are muddled on this and have been for a long time. Instead, ask people you can trust -- including the therapists -- to reflect back to you positive things about you. You may be surprised and hear things you never knew about yourself. Value those things!

Sally, you sound like a thoughtful person who is very giving to others. Now it's time to be giving and good to yourself. You are your own best friend as you are the one that's with you at all times!

As you can see in my signature, I'm 42yo. So, I'm older than you! Laughing

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:32 pm

Don't look at your old face. I mean it. Don't look at yourself in the mirror. Look at others, who will reflect smiles and affection to you.

You and yourself are not good companions right now.

A history of anorexia and BDD lets me know it is the DEPRESSION that is the problem. It is not your looks. I know you think it is, but this is distorted thinking. Your "looks" is no more the issue than your "weight" was. It is not looks or weight. It is your brain process and thinking that need care and attention. . .

I know you don't like me disagreeing with you, and I hated it when people did it to me. I am basically asking your "mind train" to jump its track.

How about this? Make the "one thing you do today" fit a combination of feeling better and lookiing better. Get a good multivitamin and some hyaluronic capsules, along with a B complex. These will profit both your mind and your skin. :-

Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:35 pm

Sally, I am so sorry that you've been overwhelmed with such pain and distress that you haven't been able to see any other options. It sounds as if your pain has become too great to deal with on your own and it is good that you have the help of therapists on your side. Is there anyone close to home that you can talk with about your feelings? Family and friends they tend to love us no matter what we are feeling or going through.

As far as loneliness goes, you are not alone as there are so many struggling with the same thing. You might find some good suggestions in this thread:
http://www.essentialdayspa.com/forum/viewthread.php?tid=29676&highlight=lonely

Lots of kind and practical advice from everyone. Definitely a good idea to avoid mirrors for now. In fact, get rid of them or put them all away. They are not useful or productive as the reflection back somehow gets distorted in your mind.

One bright, positive aspect to be acknowledged is that you have reached out when you are feeling your worst by posting on EDS today. And others have responded.

One other thought... have you ever considered getting a cat, dog bird or? It's always helpful to have something other than ourselves to focus our energies and attentions on and pets can be the most loyal of companions.

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:43 pm

You may want to try Energy Psychology techniques like Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) [free manual atwww.emofree.com ] as an adjunct to your therapy. Do a search on YouTube for EFT, TAT (Tapas Acupressure Technique, etc.). A great intro book is "The Promise of Energy Psychology" by David Feinstein, Donna Eden, and Gary Craig (of EFT fame): www.innersource.net/energy_psych/energy_psychology.htm www.amazon.com/Promise-Energy-Psychology-Revolutionary-Dramatic/dp/1585424420/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1217104888&sr=8-1

Also guided visualizations and positive uplifting programs like - you can listen to audio samples of guided visualization CDs at this site:
For depression www.healthjourneys.com/Category.aspx?mcid=17&catid=5
Healing trauma www.healthjourneys.com/Product_Detail.aspx?catid=34&id=19
Mental Health, including relaxation www.healthjourneys.com/MainCategory.aspx?mcid=5

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:45 pm

Hi Havana

thank you for messaging me with such kind words. I dont really have anyone to talk to . Its a strange relationship between my mum and myself though its better the past couple of years but i can not talk to her. She gets quite nasty with me when i do but i guess that might be frustration because im so down on myself too. My dad is not one i can talk to either. I do have a cat. Ive had him 3 years. Hes my best friend and loves me to bits. I took him in as he was a stray. I have a habit of takin in stray cats lol.

Maybe therapy will help but i do also need to find somethings that will help me look better too because i know thats what its going to take. I always feel better if im looking better. Im not sure if that sounds shallow or anything but it does

maybe if i could sort my skincare out a bit and find somecreams that can help it will help my low self esteem too

xx

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:45 pm

Sally,

I can't possibly add anything to the wonderful and well-thought-out advice that previous posters have given you but I did want to say "Happy Birthday" to you, friend. God had a special reason for putting you on this earth (and keeping you here, despite your prayers otherwise); I believe that whole-heartedly and pray that you will soon as well.

A big hug sent your way.....

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:06 pm

Thank you Brenpasta. Im truely trying to think positively and everything and thank youfor the birthday wishes. What a day its been. I spent the day crying on and off and apart from the last couple of hours ive been in bed for the rest. Seems if i can sleep i can forget it all and what i look like. Only thing is each time i woke up i was reminded of how old im looking and it is that bit that is making me hate myself and not want people to see me

Well this little lady is probably going to go back to bed to try sleep some more time away

Im sorry im so miserable and thank you all for your help etc xxx

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:06 pm

Sally, yes Happy Birthday!

I'm going to be direct here and not sugar-coat it:
If you truly feel you don't want to wake up in the morning, have you thought about inpatient care where you can have access to help 24/7?

Please please get someone to help you NOW. I know this is tough to hear. If someone told me she was having chest pain, I would not pussyfoot around either. Your pain is just as serious. If you don't know where to start, go to the Emergency Department. If you are thinking about suicide it IS an emergency. I credit you for seeking help here, but please get a professional to work with you immediately.

Hugs
fawnie

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:15 pm

Hi Fawnie

The two therapists i see both know exactly how i feel. Ive told them over and over again about the thoughts i have.

I know its a mental disorder of somesort but i also know if i can do something to make me look better ill feel bette. Ive even spoken about that to them and they say i have to learn to like me for me. I really do appreciate that i do need to like me but I also know me better than anyone and when im feeling im not looking so old im actually feeling alot brighter and liking myself. If i could afford cosmetic surgery I would but as i cant im looking for all the hlep with my skincare and what creams can help reduce the bags and crepiness under my eyes. I know this is not the whole answer. Ive got to look deep inside myself and love from within to but like i say for me to feel better i have to be looking i abit better. I dotn thinkpeople understand that bit of me really. Maybe they think im daft to think that xxx

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:44 pm

Sally,
forgive me for being blunt, but Sidda is right in saying that when you have BDD, no amount of cosmetics or procedures in the world is going to make you happy in the long run. That's just a bandaid on a hemorrhage. Being American women, we are heavily invested in looking young and perfect and the media just makes it worse. I think Europeans are more "comfortable in their skin", but I don't know why. Cultural differences I spose.

I'm not a therapist, but have you actually told them that you pray to not wake up in the morning? Does that mean you are thinking about ending your life? If so, get help now.

Sometimes holidays and milestones, like birthdays, can exacerbate depression, as I'm sure you know only too well!

Hugs,
fawnie

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:44 pm

It is a sickness, as much as physical sickness is. I had one episode of depression about 2 years ago that lasted a couple of months. I didn't want to get up in the morning, all I wanted to do was sleep. I went about my day fine, but I just wanted to get back to sleep all the time. I was in college, I wound up failing most of my classes. I was in danger of being kicked out of school and losing my (full tuition) scholarship. I didn't lose it because I did really well the following semester (most people are only kicked out after 2 semesters in a row on probation) and I've been really motivated and hard working since then. I can't even describe the horror I felt at the prospect of failing out. I've done really well since then, I have reason to be proud of myself.

Anyway just this past week I kinda felt it again. I just didn't want to get out of bed. I missed 2 days of work (just this past wednesday and thursday), I called in sick. On Thursday I couldn't get up because I was so mad at myself for not going to work on Wednesday. I know it sounds ridiculous when I type it out. On Friday when I did go in to work I was so unhappy with myself... In the morning I had to go to the bathroom to cry before I was able to pull myself together.

When people asked about me, that I was sick, I just said "yes". Meanwhile I was thinking in my head "mental illness is illness too". That was the punchline I was getting to all this time Very Happy

(But this is so not something I would want my boss/coworkers to know. A cold is so much less embarrassing)

The good thing is that I recognized it for what it was. And really, I haven't had another episode of depression since that big one, I thought that it was a one time thing and it was never going to happen again. So I did recognize it for what it was and I decided I had to fight it. I went shopping, I called a friend, I got my favorite ice cream, I got more exercise...

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:16 pm

Dear Sally.
Just wanted to say Happy Birthday to you. I wish for you that all your future birthdays will be better than this one. Some people say that life begins at 40. I hope that's the case for you and wish you all the best.

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:55 pm

Thank you for sharing your heartbreaking feelings.Sometimes getting it out helps.
And what wonderful caring advice you have gotten here.

One of the cheapest and most effective skin helper for my ugly skin has been exfoliation.(microfiber cloth) How about a sugar scrub,or aspirin or combo. It will perk you up.

You have a lot of people here, sending good and powerful energy to you.

God loves you

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 4:09 pm

Dear Sally,

I know a little bit of what you are going through. My older sister tried to end her life not so long ago and I was so mad at her. I was so upset because I thought she was being so selfish and the fact that I couldn't fathom life without her in it. Reading your post brought tears to my eyes because it reminds me of my sister.

I know that life doesn't seem worthwhile, but I assure you, you are on the right tract to a happier life. The fact that you are seeking help from therapists tells me that you are not ready to leave us here quite yet. I think you have a lot more living to do and just do it at your pace. Instead of bombarding yourself with the same thoughts try doing things that make you 'happy'.

Try something new like going to yoga classes if you don't go already. Find things that make you happy and embrace life. I know my sister got out of her 'rut' by seeking things that made her happy rather than do things that we wanted her to do etc...Btw, she still does take her meds, but on the other hand, she's happier because she makes her decisions and does things to make her happier.

I hope you take to heart the suggestions that have been made here. You are one of us, you are a skin care guru too. We are all here on EDS because we want the next best thing or whatever will help our skin not look so saggy, wrinkly, spotty etc...Don't fret over your appearance just lather those creams on, drink plenty of water and keep seeking help and do things that will make you happier. Remember, baby steps are okay at this point. I wish you my best and of course, a Happy Birthday!!!

And a big HUG!

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 5:21 pm

Hey Sally a huge {{{{huuuggg}}}} from me to you.
While your therapists mull over the best treatment for you, hot foot it to your Doctor and get some meds!!
I've been depressed twice in my life and I swear by anti-depressant medication in the short term. Both times, I took the pills for 6 months and I can tell you, they saved my sanity.
As others have rightly said, your perception of your looks at this time is distorted. You're probably not nearly as bad looking as you think you are. Sheeze, none of us are perfect. If we were we wouldn't be hanging around EDS looking for our HG's Very Happy

Why not get out of bed and give yourself a 'spa day'? Relax in a nice warm bath, with some nice music playing, give yourself a facial, mani and pedi - just be nice to yourself, you damned well deserve it!!
And don't even think about suicide, your cat needs you and think of all the tomorrows and life experiences you'd miss.

Chin up and get those meds Wink

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 6:29 pm

Hello

,real depression is a lot more common than people think. I think it is important to search for the right medication - some just make things worse. But it is only the first step.

I know that things I am about to say may seem useless to you now when you you are sitting in the bottom of dark pit feeling like there is no way out - but if you chip away, bit by bit you will realise you are a valuable person and you are worth it!

-I have seen great results from physical activity and getting in touch with nature. It is greatly underestimated. Just walking/swimming 40 mins a day, and being able to sit in a garden or a park have been discovered to make a big difference - believe it or not! A recent survey showed that just being able to see trees outside your window helps with moods by 50%. troublesome kids improved, hospital patients healed faster etc.

-I also believe that group therapy will do a lot of good. Can your doctor recommend one? Also check with your local council, library notice board, community house etc. There WILL be one out there. (For instance I found Al Anon made a big difference to me). Self help groups
understand you, don't judge you and help with the loneliness and disconnection that you are currently feeling.

-I also think that reading a couple of chapters daily from an appropriate self help book help keeps your mind focussed and your spirit encouraged to keep doing all the above. There are heaps out there! It is kind of like reinforcing a positive message. I advise regular daily reading for a period of months.

-Love a pet. Seriously - cats are wonderful to pat and care for. Personally, I love my guinea pig. Animals give you unconditional acceptance.

-Reaching out to others in need is great too. Do a little volunteer work-at the RSPCA, homeless shelter etc. Studies show this greatly improves our sense of worth and well being.

Finally, none of us are as pretty or youthful as we would like to be. Everyone bears emotional burdens throughout their lives (even though we don't get to see them). Most people have borne a loss, whether it be a death, losing a relationship etc. Others struggle with illness, or other unfair burdens. (As Scott Peck says "life wasn't meant to be easy"). So, the answer for me has been to plan for the future, but live in the moment. I think we are all looking for inner peace.

All of the above may seem a bit overwhelming at the moment, so take baby steps first and let one small achievement build on another.

Today - get yourself to a library and borrow a few inspirational self help books and start reading.
When you next see your doctor, review your medication and ask him about a self help group. That meeting can become the highlight of your week!

I am guessing that you really do not look as bad as you think you do. It is true though that how we look affects how we feel. Exfoliate, moisturise, slap on some makeup and update your hair cut. But look after the inside too.
Sending you positive vibes all the way from Australia

Surprised

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 7:12 pm

btw, sidda, love what you have to say! wave

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:17 pm

Sidda wrote:

These are good recommendations. And, speaking as a person who has had clinical depression all my life -- and been on medications (with varying degrees of success) since lllooong before it was trendy -- I do understand what you're going through. I was a candidate for ECT (electroconvulsive therapy) TWICE.

Please, please, please, seek out a doctor, couselour, therapist. You are very depressed; I can hear it in your words. The tinny echo of hopelessness and... hopelessness. When you spend the day in bed (and I have spent many days in bed, all of which I wish I had back), you have a MEDICAL PROBLEM. There are programs and sliding payment scales and lots of help out there. You have to summon up the courage and energy from SOMEWHERE. (I won't tell you to "pull yourself up from your bootstraps;" I am painfully aware that you have no bootstraps right now) and look on the internet or in the yellow pages for professional help. Google your town and "therapy sliding scale" or "low cost."

Just do that much. A tiny effort will make you feel remarkably more empowered and in control. If you are not up to that, answer this:

What can you do RIGHT NOW that will make you feel more competent and productive and proud? I remember one day, for me, it was "clean out the cat box." Which I did. I wasn't up to doing the dishes. But I could dump out the cat box. I thought I'd give it "a try." And I stayed up that day. That tiny effort started a string of tasks over the next few weeks and months that got me better.

You will not be happier with how you look until you are happier with how you feel (NOT the other way around). You are caught in a downward spiral of negative thinking, and you need serious intervention to put the brakes on.

I can tell you that the Universe did not put you here to suffer, that you will feel better when you think in terms of what you can give to the world, rather than what you can get, that your thinking is clouded with chemicals and electrical patterns that you cannot WILL your way out of -- any more than a diabetic can WILL herself into producing natural insulin.

Please. For the good of the WORLD. What tiny, tiny thing can you do RIGHT NOW to make yourself feel better? Take a shower? Research depression at the library? Call someone and talk about nothing at all -- just check in and ask how THEY are?

I have spent many, many days and YEARS where you are. Completely paralyzed. It is not how life was meant to be.

And, may I add? Being alone is NOT the worst thing in the world. Unless you are with someone who abuses you with catastrophic thinking and negative talk and self-abuse.

Treat yourself at LEAST as kindly as you would treat a ten year old child. Who you loved.

Don't try to change the world or your looks or your life all at once. Do one tiny thing today. Just one. I know it's terribly overwhelming to even think about. Sometimes my only way out was this three-step thought process:

1. Accept your feelings (don't ignore or dismiss them)
2. Know your purpose (turn on the shower, stand up and leave your room)
3. Do what needs to be done. (just go through the motions, to start)

This small springboard will change the chemicals in your brain and start to clear your thinking.

Do what you must to feel better. Feelings are NOT facts.

Honey. I'll be 53 on August 10. People respond sooo much more positively to me now than when I was 28 -- and "gorgeous." Connection -- with yourself, with others, with your God/Universe -- is what life is all about.

Be generous. Give.

I wish you strength and peace.

Salster,
Everyone has given you wisdom and good advice. I especially sense that Sidda's post is speaking directly to you. Please read and reread this post because it is what you need. It is difficult for you to believe but the problem is not your face, it is much deeper but not impossible to come through. Realize that you are a person of worth regardless of what you look like. You are valuable and you have a purpose. You need some direction outside of yourself. Be persistent in your pursuit to heal and start to see yourself for the person you really are. You are reaching out and that is certainly a first step. Keep taking those steps
and believe that you can be happy and at peace with the inside as well as the outside of you.I will pray that you will get the help you need so you can truly start living an abundant life.
Toby

free skin care · Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:39 pm

To Dear Sally,

I'm so upset reading your posts, that for the first time in my life, I'm at a loss for words.
But just look at all the wonderful advice your getting, from so many great gals, who have your best interest at heart. I totally concur with all of their wonderful advice.

For my contribution, I would like to treat you to a nice little package delivered to your home, with some of my homemade serums and creams, that will help you address some of your concerns. (If your interested, just PM me your contact info, and leave the rest to me. If you can send me a picture, and a description of your skin, that would be most helpful also.)

As for the "dreaded bags", I'm afraid there is little you'll find short of surgery to make them disappear. But with 40 years of dealing with them myself, I can tell you this; the best way to hide them, is with a great big beautiful smile.

Sally, I hope that this day will be a turning point in your life for the better. Please find the help that you need to help you heal from the inside out. Do a little googling for local support groups in your area, and by all means seek out medical intervention. With the help of God, hopefully the suicide thoughts will not be back, but if that happens again, please call the "suicide hotline" that all states have.

Well now, it looks like a found a few words to say after all... Laughing

Just know Sally, that you matter a great deal to all of us. I'm sending you a great big birthday hug and kiss, and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Automatic Message

If this is your first visit to the EDS Forums please take the time to register. Registration is required for you to post on the forums. Registration will also give you the ability to track messages of interest, send private messages to other users, participate in Gift Certificates draws and enjoy automatic discounts for shopping at our online store. Registration is free and takes just a few seconds to complete.

Click Here to join our community.

If you are already a registered member on the forums, please login to gain full access to the site.