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Thu Jan 24, 2008 12:37 pm  |
Recently I bumped into an old college aquaintance, we were not the best of friends and she was really quite horrible to me a couple of occasions. She was always better looking, blonde great figure and a real party girl, you get the picture. She is a couple of years younger than me but I was shocked at how aged she looked when I saw her the other week. She commented that I hadn't aged a bit and wanted to know what I did to my skin. I pointed out that I don't smoke or drink and that I use sunscreen and mentioned Dr Hauschka products but failed to tell her about the other things I use which probably make the real diffrence such as Retin A, TCA Peels, Vit C and CP's and I feel a little bit bad about this now.
To be honest although my close family and boyfriend know and often tease me about my skin care obsession and I have one girlfriend I talk about it with usually I keep it quiet and if someone compliments me and asks what I use I generally say Dr Hauschka and skip the rest.
For the most part it's not really that I am "guarding my secrets" but more that I wouldn't really want everyone knowing about my little obsession as perhaps it would reveal too much about my insecurites.
I also think I have done some pretty crazy things to my skin and although in the long run I don't think I have done any harm to myself but wouldn't want to encourage someone to leap into doing home TCA peels just becuase it works for me.
So what do you do? Do you share your routine with anyone who asks or do you keep quiet about it or does it depend on who is asking? Do you want to keep your advantage for yourself or would you just be embarrassed if people knew what you got up to in front of the bathroom mirror (eg: no way I'm telling my boyfriend about my dermaroller, he'd have me locked up!)
Of course we all share here but I am interested to know what you give away in your day to day life.
Pandora x |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 12:57 pm |
For close friends and family I spill, with strangers if they are asking about a specific part of my regimen, I will tell them about the product/s I'm using. Leaving out my diatribe about SLS, parabens, cones, what have you. Cause that makes me look like a crazy person to the uninitiated!  If they seem hungry for info I always refer them to EDS forum/online store. I do however have the bad habit of being somewhat militant about demanding they use a SS, of course that leads to the whole chemical vs. physical stability fiasco. Honestly there is just sooooo much to know and understand, I'm MAYBE half way there myself, telling them to just start reading threads on EDS is sometimes easier.
Now, as far as letting people in on my routine and secrets....I have to say sometimes I'm a naughty girl. If I click with the stranger I would be willing to buy her coffee and let her pick my brain, if not or if she is rude, I say I stay out of the sun but mostly its good genes!  |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:13 pm |
I only mention my regime to my sister, close friends and family and of course my EDS buddies. Anyone, such as catty ex-college classmates- I always leave out the important details!
I feel bad sometimes too, but hey, if someone never helped me out, or did something catty to me, why should I help them look better??
CG |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:14 pm |
I'd tell everything I used as long as people asked me. But most of the time they change subject before I finish.  |
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53, DermaQuest, NCN Products, PMD, Dermarolling |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:36 pm |
It really depends whose asking and how they ask it. If a genuine interest is there, I'll share my my skincare routine [er, if time permits] because I love to share!
If I see their eyes begin to glaze over, I'll truncate my routine down to the barest essentials: Clean yo' face before you go to bed, always use a mineral sunscreen everyday, use antioxidants, exfoliate, moisturize and treat your hands/neck/chest just as nice as you do your face.
If someone asks me in a catty kind of way, I'll attribute everthing to great genes 
Then there are a few close friends and family who kind of roll their eyes when I get on the organic/natural bandwagon and make comments that I should spend my money more wisely. Well it's my money and I'll spend it the way I like, thank you very much! |
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44 – combo/oily skin with a tendency towards clogged pores. Thanks to EDS, tweaked my skincare routine and normalized skin… no more breakouts. PSF, silk powder, Janson Beckett, Cellbone, NIA24 are staples. |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:58 pm |
| athena123 wrote: |
Then there are a few close friends and family who kind of roll their eyes when I get on the organic/natural bandwagon and make comments that I should spend my money more wisely. Well it's my money and I'll spend it the way I like, thank you very much! |
RIGHT!!!?? Why is it that women are made to feel soooo guilty for spending any amount of money strictly on themselves? |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:04 pm |
| vonstella wrote: |
| athena123 wrote: |
Then there are a few close friends and family who kind of roll their eyes when I get on the organic/natural bandwagon and make comments that I should spend my money more wisely. Well it's my money and I'll spend it the way I like, thank you very much! |
RIGHT!!!?? Why is it that women are made to feel soooo guilty for spending any amount of money strictly on themselves? |
Very true I also have come up against this attitude as well. I just ordered the Clarisonic and it is expensive at Ł100 but I know lot's of people who would spend that on a night out drinking and at least I will get a lot of use out of my money on something that matters to me.
I do find the way in which we share or not about our skincare regimes very interesting. I think that you perhaps do have to be a little bit obsessed to go to all the trouble of learning about what works and trying out diffrent products and approches to see what helps you. In my experiance a lot of people just want to be told that it's a cream or range you use as all the diffrent things most people here do to their skin can seem expensive and time consuming which it is at least until you get into a good routine. So if you start telling them what you do use they just sort of tune out because it's not what they want to hear. I'm the same about other things I guess but when it comes to my skin I'm all ears! |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:40 pm |
Hehehe, VS and Athena, I love that you guys are selective about what you reveal depending on the person's attitude! Honestly, I don't think I've dealt with anyone who had a bad attitude asking me -- they just don't bother with me, haha. But I'll have to keep that in mind.
I'm selective about how much I reveal, too, but most of my close genuine friends know that skincare is a big fun thing for me. People who know me well know it's something I've been into for years and years, and they often ask me for advice or tips (or not -- and I try not to give it if I'm not asked, except that I too am militant about getting people to use sunscreen!).
But with strangers/acquaintances/coworkers and such, it's trickier. I think I'm pretty good at getting a read for how genuine people are, so I'm pretty candid with people who give me a good vibe. The only time I ever shut up is when I'm dealing with sales clerks -- there are SO many ingredients I prefer to avoid, and so many SAs are so dang pushy with their lines and dismissive of other concerns, that I try to avoid that discussion altogether.
And when people randomly compliment me on my skin, and it's just a passing interaction (and not time for coffee and brain-picking and all that, haha) I just stress the sunscreen part more than anything. I figure that's good, easy, and simple-to-remember advice. Who knows what they'd retain from my whole spiel! |
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32, fair hair/eyes/skin, always a mix of dry/oily/sensitive/acne/clogged pores. But I keep getting compliments on my skin, so something must be working! Beauty blog at http://heliotro.pe; online dating coaching at http://theheartographer.com |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:32 pm |
| Not telling! |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:46 pm |
This is a funny topic. I always get complimented on my skin but people rarely ask what I am using. They jut assume being African_American that it's just good genes. They have no idea what a battle it is balancing my "blessing" of eternally oily skin. 32 and still breaking out!!!
When people do ask I rarely get into all of my products. Cleansers, masks, moisturizers and serums. If I have one new product that I am crazy about then I will tell them about that. For mean girls, I just shrug and tell them I'm really lucky. 
The only person that knows my entire routine is my mother who thinks I'm nuts when it comes to my skin but she loves getting my leftovers. |
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33, dark skin, oil-slick |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 7:24 pm |
| i dont mind telling online.....but offline lol i dont |
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age 33 .. skin dry with odd breakout now and then. skin color best i can describe is golden brown..tans easily |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 7:36 pm |
You guys are cracking me up. Like simran, I share everything online. Other than that, I share with my mother, (who isnt really interested, but humors me by sitting quietly and nodding, while she is probably thinking about something that actually intrigues her-and I assure you it has nothing to do with the latest news on copper peptides) and my sisters. I would share with friends, but they dont ask. Since Im still fairly young, they probably just attribute my skin to that. But maybe they'll start asking when the 30's or 40's hit and I look the same! lol. (I hope!  ) |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 8:25 pm |
Great topic! I don't have friends or family who have the same interest as I do in skin care.
I really share my thoughts here, but if someone did ask me, (like a co-worker) I just tell them that sunblock is my beauty secret. If they push for more, then I would mention vitamin C and using Swiss skin care products. |
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Thu Jan 24, 2008 10:40 pm |
| Hi, it is funny that you should start this thread because very recently I saw some ladies at a funeral whom I have not seen in 10 yrs. and they said that I looked exactley the same and asked if I have had a face lift. Then one of them asked what lotions and potions I have been using and like you I said Dr. Hauschka and nothing else. To be honest I combine vitamins and supplements along with good skin care rountine to hold on to the youth and I am very private about my skin care. I do not want to share any secrets with anyone except with the ladies on EDS. |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 5:56 am |
| angelwings1226 wrote: |
| You guys are cracking me up. Like simran, I share everything online. Other than that, I share with my mother, (who isnt really interested, but humors me by sitting quietly and nodding, while she is probably thinking about something that actually intrigues her-and I assure you it has nothing to do with the latest news on copper peptides) |
Sounds very familiar I'll think about you and your mother the next time I have a skin care "conversation" with my bored, nodding mother  |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 9:43 am |
If anyone asks, I try to gauge their level of interest (or it that tolerance?) and reply accordingly. Being post-menopausal, I find all of my similarly-aged women friends are more interested in all of those issues than in skincare per se. And I don't want to bore people. (If you've ever innocently inquired about someone's hobby or pet interest only to regret it an hour later when they are still deeply involved in sharing esoterica with you, you know what I mean...)I think most people who know me are more inclined to ask me about my weight loss than my skincare; maybe commenting about skin seems more personal or intimate to people?
I've never held back, though, if I thought the person was honestly interested. I have one friend in particular who I often share my latest experiments and experiences in skincare and makeup with. And of course all my virtual friends online here at EDS... |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 10:14 am |
| No one asks me so I don't tell. I guess they just assume that I am younger than I look because the rest of the package fits (size 0). As for my mom and sis, they are not really interested in anything but cheap products and short routines. I was always the one getting into my mom's unused Avon samples and putting makeup on the dog! As for mean girls, there is one in my office who always bad mouths me when she is stupid drunk at office parties, she is the same age as me but smokes and drinks and probable eats all the wrong things! I would probably help her out if she genuinely asks! |
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47, former sunworshipper, skincare addict, oily T-zone, fair skinned, love Vita A, some hyperpigmentation, microneedler. |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 11:05 am |
| Most of my friends and family know my 'product' obsession and tease me about it, but lately I have had more and more of them asking me what I use so I must be doing something right. If someone asks me I do share my favorite products with them. |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 9:04 pm |
| I wouldn't mind telling anyone that cared enough to ask (I would be flattered!), but no one seems to care about my beauty regimen. |
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Fri Jan 25, 2008 11:39 pm |
| I've always gotten compliments on my skin, and I just say thank you. I would tell people what I used if they asked --- but since I'm constantly changing my routine, I don't really have a good answer! |
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Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:05 am |
I feel really ashamed of myself now  ! I must admit I did feel a little bit victorious when I saw my old nemesis looking so washed up and felt that withholding my "secrets" was my little revenge for all the trouble she caused me back in the day. While she was moaning about her skin I had to bite my tounge not to say ..."well you get the face you deserve". I guess the mature thing would have been to forgive, forget and share.
I will do so in future providing people are actually interested! |
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Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:52 am |
| I'll tell anyone who is really interested and asks what I'm using. That tends to lead to a conversation about what goes it the body as well as what goes on it which can be a long conversation but if it starts someone thinking about the whole chemicals/natural/organic debate and what we do to ourselves and the environment then its time well spent. |
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Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:53 am |
| pandora77 wrote: |
I feel really ashamed of myself now ! I must admit I did feel a little bit victorious when I saw my old nemesis looking so washed up and felt that withholding my "secrets" was my little revenge for all the trouble she caused me back in the day. While she was moaning about her skin I had to bite my tounge not to say ..."well you get the face you deserve". I guess the mature thing would have been to forgive, forget and share.
I will do so in future providing people are actually interested! |
Awww, dont feel too bad! The important thing is that you see the situation for what it was now. I think that shows you have a good heart. Who knows, maybe she is thinking about the encounter too and will change her lifestyle/attitude...you might have helped her without even knowing it. |
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Sat Jan 26, 2008 9:03 am |
| Same here... If someone compliments me (particularly if it's a sincere compliment ) and asks, I'll share. |
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Sat Jan 26, 2008 9:13 am |
When asked, I don't mind sharing at all: religious use of sunscreen and staying out of the sun along with the Llumar UVShield which filters out 99.9% UVA & UVB rays, along with alternating use of Retin-A, Ferulic, and a glycolic acid - or just Retin-A and SkinCeuticals C+AHA if I'm wanting to really pare down my routine. Of course, eating well and taking supplements is important, too.
If a female is genuinely wanting to improve and prevent, I think it is so important to share what I've learned and help others out - but that is a huge passion of mine anyway. |
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